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|I am me and I am unshakable; Colgate supplement
UndergraduateLizzKnu - Dec 10, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 10, 2013
|The snarling of the trumpet soloist snaps me back into reality; perfectly content.
UndergraduateDan13 - Dec 10, 2013 / jdg - Dec 10, 2013
|I begin to reminisce back to my freshman year; place perfectly content.
3 - I would definitely start with the image of that moment when you knew that marching band was where you...
UndergraduateDan13 - Nov 12, 2013 / jdg - Dec 10, 2013
|success is not only for those who get the best chances- value i strongly believe
4 - Thank you very much :) I need to submit it soon, is there other grammatical errors to be fixed?...
Undergraduatelidiaep - Dec 5, 2013 / lidiaep - Dec 10, 2013
|I just found out that my passion is not in art; My Personal Statement to HKU
UndergraduateJfryKenanga - Dec 10, 2013 / JfryKenanga - Dec 10, 2013
|Common App: A story that is central to your identity? - Trains
7 - Well.... I feel your response for this prompt, central to your identity is not really in line with what...
UndergraduateNerdFighter - Nov 29, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|"Welcome to the Jincai Law Club" UIUC prompt 2: describe an experience
Undergraduatexujunjiejack - Nov 30, 2013 / xujunjiejack - Dec 10, 2013
|I braced myself for a bombardment of questions ; UBC- volunteer experience
3 - Oh... You think so? :( I am torn whether to completely change my approach then... I am afraid my...
Undergraduatehj135500 - Dec 9, 2013 / hj135500 - Dec 10, 2013
|Short softball; Sports have always been an important aspect of my life
3 - .... I'd like to suggest a slight shift in word arrangement; Sports, especially softball, have always been an...
Undergraduatetintinbelle - Nov 30, 2013 / dumi - Dec 10, 2013
|Lafayette College Supplement; What do you do? Why do you do it?
2 - Hello, You have answered the prompt correctly in both of these short answers. You should have no problem...
Undergraduateskriptkid - Dec 8, 2013 / admission2012 - Dec 9, 2013
|Take the challenge! Face your fears!; UBC- Significant Challenge
UndergraduateParagraphGraph - Dec 7, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|'No Birthday or Christmas present' - Essay for biggest obstacle
3 - Those two children, who were even not my father's blood relations knew my father better than I knew...
Undergraduatedolphin23 - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|"Nothing in this world is free" The Greatest Gift in Life
3 - "Nothing in this world is free", was my Grandfather's inspiring slogan that I and my family believed in...
UndergraduateKhang - Nov 16, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|"Why are you so quiet?" - Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure.
Undergraduatejkpk996 - Dec 8, 2013 / fatihy007 - Dec 9, 2013
|I became fascinated with genetics; Why Nursing & Why Mount Union?
UndergraduateAnge1031 - Dec 8, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|I grew up with a single mom; University of Colorado- enrich diverse &inclusive community
Undergraduateash101 - Nov 13, 2013 / dumi - Dec 9, 2013
|Laboratory research. College of Agriculture and Life Sciences: Cornell CommonApp Essay
Undergraduatebonjour - Dec 7, 2013 / bonjour - Dec 8, 2013
|I'm stuck here wondering about my future; Transfer to old west bury
3 - It's good if you included the prompt so that we can understand what this writing is exactly about. ...
Undergraduatej_maravilla - Nov 13, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|"Mental Transformation" - UC; World I come from
UndergraduateMellowjedi203 - Nov 26, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|My grandmother abruptly passed away; UC- Personal experience
3 - Well.... I too feel this response does not really answer the prompt. This question is more focused on how...
UndergraduateAdame96 - Nov 25, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|"HEALTH" UW-Madison UNNOTICED ESSAY
Undergraduateddeegiizaya - Dec 7, 2013 / ddeegiizaya - Dec 8, 2013
|"It's true, I am afraid of dying; Brown Transfer - field of study
Undergraduatemgray14 - Nov 13, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|BASE BALL - Common App- Northwestern and John's Hopkins
Undergraduateeliencarnacion - Nov 7, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|They called for a free and open political atmosphere ; Background or story
3 - Yes.... This response fails to portray you as a person which the admission people would really looking forward...
Undergraduatejavacoffee - Dec 3, 2013 / dumi - Dec 8, 2013
|Personal background; Tell us the most important things about you and your life
2 - I feel you should be more creative with the presentation of this response. You don't have to say...
Undergraduatethundergirl2014 - Dec 7, 2013 / Pahan - Dec 7, 2013
|Technology can only changes our traditions not to destroy our traditional values
5 - When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. it is testimony to...
Undergraduatepratik012 - Nov 22, 2013 / lashari - Dec 7, 2013
|Poverty was not an issue to deal with; UBC - Experience that caused me to rethink
Undergraduatedavinangai - Dec 7, 2013 / davinangai - Dec 7, 2013
|'Teaching foundation' - UC UNDERGRAD APP ESSAY 1
4 - Nothing irritated me more that answering the ever repeated question that what I want to be in future...
UndergraduateDanyal73 - Nov 22, 2013 / dumi - Dec 7, 2013
|Rutgers Essay on Diversity - A Young Entrepreneur in New York City
3 - Hi, Very interesting. I think in order to make this essay stronger, maybe you could attack it by...
Undergraduatealexriv70 - Dec 1, 2013 / admission2012 - Dec 6, 2013
|Transfer Essay-Why transfer? (WFU, Skidmore, Vassar, UNC-CH, Davidson)
2 - Hello, Spare the readers the story about how insatiable your appetite for learning is. It is really cheesy...
Undergraduatemmitchell32 - Dec 3, 2013 / admission2012 - Dec 6, 2013
|Cultural or social environment essay for Peace Corps application:
2 - What is the connection between the first and the second line? In what ways Colombia was different to...
UndergraduateMadison724 - Dec 6, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|'money' society's most significant challenge: stanford supplementary essay
UndergraduateRo4 - Dec 6, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|independence- i wish i were there. stanford: a historical event i wish i'd witnessed
UndergraduateRo4 - Dec 6, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|I was standing in a 324 mts tall structure; CENTRAL TO IDENTITY
Undergraduateduquevan - Dec 5, 2013 / duquevan - Dec 6, 2013
|I felt it was time I shed the old skin; People with different beliefs/experiences
Undergraduatedjh213 - Dec 1, 2013 / Riddi - Dec 6, 2013
|'Cause-and-effect' - UC -WORLD I COME FROM
Undergraduateceidynafit - Nov 29, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|My career ambition is to became a fund manager; SOP - motivation letter
2 - I think you should have elaborated a little more on this experience. Tell them how you developed such...
Undergraduateefacci00 - Dec 5, 2013 / dumi - Dec 6, 2013
|The more I tried to dry my hands, the clammier they became; DANCING/Central to identity
2 - Hello, I have no idea why so many students have such a hard time answering this prompt correctly....
Undergraduatecollindching - Dec 5, 2013 / admission2012 - Dec 5, 2013
|Georgetown essay on what activity or sport do you participate in- concerned about length
2 - Hello, My Advice-- get rid of that verbose opening paragraph. It serves no purpose other than making you...
Undergraduatemarijkelandon - Dec 4, 2013 / admission2012 - Dec 5, 2013
|"The only source of knowledge is experience." -The Coming of Age; childhood to adulthood
2 - Points to consider - Each paragraph should start with a topic sentence which summaries what the paragraph is about....
UndergraduateDavid260Z - Dec 1, 2013 / RashedMohamed - Dec 5, 2013
|UW essay B. - The University of Washington seeks to create a community ...
2 - Good Essay, Impressive whereas in addition i would recommend you to indicate some words in you Essays. To...
UndergraduateMaxYakovlev - Nov 30, 2013 / RashedMohamed - Dec 5, 2013
|Color Guard: Endeavoring for Perfection/ Perfectly content
UndergraduateGiannamc - Dec 1, 2013 / dumi - Dec 4, 2013
|" Always be a first rate version of yourself" ; Qualities/Unique Characteristics
Undergraduatemaiyag52 - Dec 4, 2013 / dumi - Dec 4, 2013
|Some parts of me are that of an Asian girl; MIT/ cultural background and identity
4 - Well, my approach would be that telling them your cultural roots (cultures of your parents) and the environments you...
UndergraduateLovePhys - Dec 3, 2013 / dumi - Dec 4, 2013
|'Gifting other people' - Topic C lifetime goals etc etc.
Undergraduateamarao96 - Nov 28, 2013 / Ro4 - Dec 4, 2013
|Why attend Georgia Tech? I will meet the ebullient bee community
10 - I was not born on top but born to conquer it. Nothing satisfies my thirst more than the rewards...
Undergraduatedaisythan95 - Dec 3, 2013 / daisythan95 - Dec 4, 2013
|I aspired to become a Film Producer. Academic Interest - USC short essay
Undergraduatearellyna - Nov 29, 2013 / arellyna - Dec 4, 2013
|Everybody is different; "People whose beliefs differ from your own"
Undergraduatepterodactyldave - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 4, 2013
|Want to do different things; Why Georgia Tech & what I will contribute to the community?
3 - Thanks for the feedback; I have thought about IT security but it just doesn't seem the right career for...
Undergraduatethomas011101 - Nov 30, 2013 / thomas011101 - Dec 3, 2013
|Science plus my faith is my equation for success: Considering your lifetime goals, discuss
4 - Yeah I do meet the required length, actually its way below, because applytexas counts the lines and not the...
Undergraduatesmileyud - Nov 27, 2013 / smileyud - Dec 3, 2013
|A shadow of corruption followed me every single day - Academic Challenge
4 - Can someone please help me. I mostly need help on checking my punctuation and making sure everything sounds grammatically...
UndergraduateBobJim - Dec 1, 2013 / BobJim - Dec 3, 2013
|Certainly I was ashamed; Recount an incident where you experienced failure
5 - I don't think that this essay recounts a failure incident. I believe that admission officers would not like a...
Undergraduateroscon1995 - Dec 1, 2013 / duquevan - Dec 3, 2013
|I was fascinated by how the Xbox Kinect worked; UMich: Curriculum support my interest
2 - I would suggest that you rewrite your essay to emphasize more on the school. You mention UMich in your...
Undergraduateyinxia39 - Dec 1, 2013 / Kondite - Dec 3, 2013
|Talking to a stranger; UfT/ What has inspired you to pursue engineering?
3 - Where did you meet him? Briefly mention the place or event to give more emotions and lively feelings...
Undergraduatenial - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 3, 2013
|USC's Department of Spanish and Portuguese ; USC-Academic Interest
3 - Well, your prompt is focused on Academic Interests and while I was reading the above section, I wasn't...
Undergraduatecandymare - Nov 28, 2013 / dumi - Dec 3, 2013
|Showing commitment in reaching my lifetime goals
Undergraduateashleyrod - Dec 2, 2013 / — -
|Tropical Humid to Cold foggy area- UC Personal statement Prompt#2
2 - really nice essay. Good hook, and i enjoyed reading it, i believe admission stuff will like it also. it...
UndergraduateYessay - Nov 28, 2013 / serdarovez - Dec 2, 2013
|I love solving complicated math problems ;Academic interests,how I plan to pursue them@USC
2 - I love solving a complicated math problems. Why did you include this line in this response? It...
Undergraduatejackieg8 - Dec 1, 2013 / dumi - Dec 2, 2013
|Shrimp Paste philosophy; Background or Story
Undergraduateduongnonsense - Dec 1, 2013 / duongnonsense - Dec 2, 2013
|MY AUNT'S HOUSE: Place where you are perfectly content
3 - Practically inseparable, we both enjoyed each others company than with anybody else. .... since your next sentence too...
Undergraduatescatano81 - Nov 30, 2013 / dumi - Dec 2, 2013
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