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|"What does FAMILY mean to you?" ; CENTRAL to IDENTITY
3 - thanks a lot dumi!!! sometimes I just worry that this essay isn't strong enough to present who I am...
Undergraduatecharlotteccm - Nov 8, 2013 / charlotteccm - Nov 11, 2013
|Leaving my friends; Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal
Undergraduatewolfeacevedo - Nov 7, 2013 / Altaa - Nov 11, 2013
|First generation college student in my family ; COMMON APP
UndergraduateNole412 - Nov 5, 2013 / Pahan - Nov 10, 2013
|Language fascinates me most -Law personal statement / HongKong Universities
2 - So here's my critic I like to ponder; even trivial things in daily life make me curious.Sounds like you...
Undergraduatejohnhoop - Nov 10, 2013 / smoovgee - Nov 10, 2013
|I came to the United States in the year 2000; UC Personal Statement
Undergraduatetheindian1 - Nov 7, 2013 / theindian1 - Nov 9, 2013
|Being Chinese and adopted ; Central to IDENTITY
Undergraduatemrth - Nov 7, 2013 / dumi - Nov 9, 2013
|Nuclear Physics department; MIT/ which department appeals to you most & why?
Undergraduatekeshav13579 - Nov 9, 2013 / keshav13579 - Nov 9, 2013
|Motivation letter for RSM - correction of my spelling and grammar any opinions 2 ;)
2 - I have traveled in many countries such as Spain, France, Italy, Germany, Algeria, Morocco, and Tunisia that enriched...
UndergraduateAron101 - Nov 8, 2013 / dumi - Nov 9, 2013
|Would I be required to do surgery?; Personal Statement!
UndergraduateSteezed12 - Nov 4, 2013 / Steezed12 - Nov 8, 2013
|Close your eyes. Picture yourself in a classroom; Anomalous Alex, UC prompt 2
2 - Everywhere you find the numbers and equations and see the magic of student engineers working as a...
Undergraduatebongobl - Nov 2, 2013 / Pahan - Nov 8, 2013
|CA Prompt #1: Unique background or experience - The immigrant experience and progress.
3 - All contributors, thank you so much for the very good comments. I have revised my essay and incorporated the...
Undergraduatehemip000 - Nov 8, 2013 / hemip000 - Nov 8, 2013
|I arrived at O.R. Tambo airport in South Africa; background or story
UndergraduateEdwinP1 - Nov 8, 2013 / mrth - Nov 8, 2013
|Conflicts between my parents; Transition from childhood to adulthood
5 - What is this addiction? You better specify! I grew up with worries that an average 10-year-old...
Undergraduatepayton45 - Nov 6, 2013 / dumi - Nov 8, 2013
|I must confess that I am an introspective person; personal statement to HKU
Undergraduatenguyen tien dat - Nov 3, 2013 / nguyen tien dat - Nov 8, 2013
|Standing motionless at the white doorway, I stared at rows of unfamiliar faces; Purdue Uni
Undergraduatelyhds18 - Nov 6, 2013 / theindian1 - Nov 7, 2013
|I cycled through the quiet, narrow and rejuvenating lanes; background or story
Undergraduatedarkprince17 - Nov 6, 2013 / darkprince17 - Nov 7, 2013
|My grandpa doesn't get out of his little shell ; perfectly content
2 - I don't think you need to take out the contractions, since this isn't a formal research paper. It's meant...
Undergraduategbaunach - Nov 7, 2013 / mrth - Nov 7, 2013
|Seven simple characters, held in place by a cultural undertone; COMMON APP
2 - Ahh, neopets. Those were the days. Connecting to its Sanskrit roots, Akshith means, forever, permanent, and everlasting. For...
UndergraduateVplay3 - Nov 3, 2013 / mrth - Nov 7, 2013
|Entropy to Lucidity; Thunderstorm - Where are you content?
Undergraduatekaough - Oct 28, 2013 / MaryMag96 - Nov 7, 2013
|UPENN Jerome Fisher M&T Program/ Engineering and Business
Undergraduateitsover9000 - Nov 6, 2013 / itsover9000 - Nov 7, 2013
|Tree Top Tunnel Vision; Background Story
3 - Thank you, smashcommonapp! The reason I included the Chinese crowd was because of the gasps, and to add a...
Undergraduateaminowrimo - Nov 2, 2013 / aminowrimo - Nov 7, 2013
|"My Near Death Experience" Failure Common App Essay
3 - As someone who has also 'almost died' by drowning, I can say that you described the feeling aptly in...
UndergraduateFreimuth96 - Nov 2, 2013 / smashcommonapp - Nov 7, 2013
|The true beauty of Northwestern ; Northwestern Supp;A TOOL FOR CHANGE
3 - political and social movements either in the most obvious of ways I think the "either" is a bit awkward...
UndergraduateBilboLinda - Nov 5, 2013 / mrth - Nov 6, 2013
|DONATING BLOOD; "How can you contribue and benefit from a diverse campus" - Rutgers
2 - "raised in an environment"...where donating "is" seen... I think the last paragraph is good tying together your thoughts about...
Undergraduaterichmondc - Nov 6, 2013 / whomp123 - Nov 6, 2013
|My Passion for Communication (Writing Sample for RISD)
2 - Not only were the people supportive of my motivations do you mean "choices" ? great essay. As a...
Undergraduatelillilkim - Nov 4, 2013 / lyhds18 - Nov 6, 2013
|I follow the most effective path; Why Chapman University?
2 - Ok.... you dedicate your first paragraph to tell them that you believe in practical exposure more. You first gain...
Undergraduateflaker - Nov 5, 2013 / dumi - Nov 6, 2013
|''Why did they make you our teacher, you are a kid yourself ''; Extra-curricular activity
UndergraduateDeppX - Oct 26, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|You sound terrible!; My Song Parodies: UVA Quirk
3 - Whenever I'm tired, stressed, feeling anxious or dull, I simply create a song parody to fit my emotions...
UndergraduateChristianB - Oct 30, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|'Topic done to death' - UC / personal quality
3 - Therefore, the majority of the task willingly fell toon me Well, throughout the response I had this one big...
UndergraduateEnceladus - Oct 29, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|University of Michigan: Supplementary essay- Finding a new home within my soccer team
7 - This is a very good response. You open your character too through this response. :) I guess you are...
Undergraduatejesse7chen - Oct 26, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|Moved from Thailand to America/ Technology ;"Bump in the road"/ Why UCF?
UndergraduateLemon77 - Oct 25, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|Expanding my horizons at UT Austin
2 - I love your introduction, it was very captivating! I like that you have done well in researching the opportunities...
Undergraduateskbandou27 - Nov 2, 2013 / Blastofftomars1 - Nov 5, 2013
|Kindness is by far the best quality ;FSU/leadership, learning, service& global awareness
Undergraduatetasiaturner - Nov 3, 2013 / tasiaturner - Nov 5, 2013
|I have the ability to help others; UNNOTICED
2 - By any chance, are you applying for a computer degree? If so, this statement might be unfavorable for...
Undergraduatekaster10 - Oct 24, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|Alice's Adventures in Wonderland! Essay for Fashion Institute of Technology's FMM program
4 - I realized that fashion is the strongest method that I could become anyonethe one I always wanted to be...
UndergraduateAilce - Oct 23, 2013 / dumi - Nov 5, 2013
|'digital signal processing' Statement of Interest for Undergraduate Research fellowship
UndergraduateDeepti02 - Oct 30, 2013 / Deepti02 - Nov 5, 2013
|"Let's have bizarre celebrations," ; Common good, Bowdoin College supplement
Undergraduatecafelle - Oct 31, 2013 / kaough - Nov 4, 2013
|I am a picky eater - Common App ; Background Story
UndergraduateAndyJ - Nov 4, 2013 / AndyJ - Nov 4, 2013
|"Future Careers" University of Illinois; Academic Interests/Strenghts/Future career goals
2 - It is believed by many thatVery vague. You could either find a different phrase or delete it altogether. consciousness...
Undergraduatejustin11895 - Nov 1, 2013 / Lydmeister - Nov 4, 2013
|I first met John during my sophomore year ; MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON
Undergraduatehpark - Nov 1, 2013 / mirandadaderp - Nov 4, 2013
|I belong in California, the U.K., Singapore: What matters to you and why?
UndergraduateLydmeister - Nov 3, 2013 / iluvchocalate13 - Nov 4, 2013
|'my country's conscription' - my personal event essay
5 - Thanks for spotting my mistakes! Do you think this essay would be a good response to the prompt?...
UndergraduateCyrus_T - Oct 31, 2013 / Cyrus_T - Nov 4, 2013
|My first visit to New York City; University Of Illinois -Urbana champaign essay 1
2 - "... great sense of relief because I know without a doubt..." Overall, I really enjoyed reading your essay!...
Undergraduatelyhds18 - Oct 31, 2013 / lillilkim - Nov 4, 2013
|Columbia Supplement-Tell what you found meaningful of one of the cultural event/books/etc.
6 - Thank you!...
Undergraduatecfen8433 - Nov 4, 2013 / cfen8433 - Nov 4, 2013
|I want my life to be ambitious; UChicago - learning, community, and future?
2 - Hello, This essay is way to generic. You do not mention a single concrete aspect of UChicago and...
UndergraduateDandyDots - Nov 3, 2013 / admission2012 - Nov 3, 2013
|Stanford Supplements- extracurricular, roommate, freedom, intellectual, and short answers
2 - I like your essay topics quite a lot, the one exception being your roommate letter. (I'm really struggling with...
UndergraduateKnight14 - Nov 2, 2013 / Lydmeister - Nov 3, 2013
|"Make no small plans for they have no power to stir the sOUL" - FUTRUE PLANS-
Undergraduategeneralshepherd - Nov 3, 2013 / generalshepherd - Nov 3, 2013
|I decided to join International Student Association; Extracurricular Activity
Undergraduatemich - Oct 31, 2013 / mich - Nov 3, 2013
|Taekwondo has challenged me to grow internally; FAILURE
Undergraduateharu1996 - Nov 3, 2013 / slenquist - Nov 3, 2013
|'the right choice' What in particular about Yale has influenced your decision to apply?
3 - This is not a positive note to start... The admission guys may not find this is very pleasing....
Undergraduatelumdum - Nov 2, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|Apple fan; unique qualities of Northwestern - Engineering
Undergraduatedrocd - Nov 3, 2013 / — -
|New York was a part of my life; Columbia U - most appealling about Columbia
3 - Well.... this is good writing indeed. However, your prompt asks you what is the most appealing thing about Colombia....
Undergraduateving96 - Oct 30, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|Engineering project / Happiness word - University of Virginia short essays
3 - If I am provided with funding for a small engineering project ... this is what your prompt suggests...
Undergraduatepunkiebell17 - Oct 25, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|I am not exactly the definition of diverse; CU BOULDER / DIVERSITY
Undergraduateellasnickers - Nov 2, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|Give every man thy ear but few thy voice...
Undergraduatemariam zia - Oct 11, 2013 / generalshepherd - Nov 3, 2013
|Overcoming Allergies - story central to your identity
2 - the introduction seems to me stronge, (like what William Shikspeer uses), however the remaining are very nice and simple...
UndergraduateTennisguy728 - Nov 2, 2013 / batais - Nov 3, 2013
|RSM would have given me the best opportunities; Motivation letter for the RSM
UndergraduateDanhk - Oct 31, 2013 / Danhk - Nov 3, 2013
|Brookfield Regency for Senior Living; RICE supp/ extracurricular activities
Undergraduatekrishtib - Nov 2, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|"If I were a rich man" ; UC - world you come from
3 - you moved where? why? You cannot assume the reader knows these things. Well... I find your response pretty...
UndergraduateVeradun - Nov 2, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
|Study Abroad program ; BOSTON UNIVERSITY is a good fit
3 - BU's College of Communication caught my attention instantly. I found it as a place where I'll...
UndergraduateAnumeha - Nov 2, 2013 / dumi - Nov 3, 2013
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