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|POWER; UVA College/What is your favorite word and why?
3 - ... "my life" is getting repeated heavily :( I guess your word should have appeared much earlier than...
UndergraduateExpIore - Sep 23, 2013 / dumi - Oct 4, 2013
|Smith creates an environment where I can proudly do what I love!
Undergraduatelehahaiphuong - Oct 1, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 4, 2013
|Challenges faced in a foreign land ; UCF Common App
Undergraduategchc05 - Oct 1, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 4, 2013
|I thought I was tough; " What Tough is " - TULANE PERSONAL STATEMENT
2 - The idea behind this essay is phenomenal and really touching. I don't think you should change the ending at...
UndergraduateSinigoma1 - Oct 3, 2013 / baileynmerrill - Oct 3, 2013
|Essay on Volunteering in Chinese National Guard, common app
7 - you could start your essay with something dramatic like "Police officers are known as the safeguard in society. They...
Undergraduatechristopherpeng - Oct 9, 2011 / skila92 - Oct 3, 2013
|The pride and unity; Virginia Tech Essay/ 5 reasons you want to be a Hokie
Undergraduatecbirdy - Oct 2, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 3, 2013
|Excellence is a prime weapon of a dexter person; "excellence is a habit"
4 - First, you should present your essayin a more tidy manner. Throughout the essay you begin your sentences with simple...
Undergraduateumesh prasad - Sep 19, 2013 / dumi - Oct 3, 2013
|I tend to ignore problems by dancing; personal quality / Common App
Undergraduatektang96 - Oct 1, 2013 / dumi - Oct 3, 2013
|"I want my tears back"; UVA supplement -Music that challenged,unsettled,surprised you?
2 - Stay awake! Get mind clear! Don't you want to be a mathematician? Do it now! Now! Very interesting...
Undergraduatewuhen - Oct 1, 2013 / dumi - Oct 3, 2013
|"I tie my last knot," -Quilting: 150 Extracurricular Essay
3 - Slowly opening my eyes, I immerse in the pleasure of admiring the beautiful hand-made quilt that took my...
Undergraduateroxy481 - Sep 30, 2013 / dumi - Oct 3, 2013
|I personally love the metro life; Boston Univeristy supp
2 - As a denizen of eastern Masschusetts, my inclination is more towards metro life that Boston could offer. ...
Undergraduatecj122 - Oct 1, 2013 / dumi - Oct 2, 2013
|Stanford Essay: From A Job to "Pass the Time" to Lessons LEarnt - extracurricular activity
UndergraduateXevoz - Sep 15, 2013 / dumi - Oct 2, 2013
|Why are you interested in attending Oglethorpe University?location, school size, and acade
UndergraduateElementary11 - Sep 21, 2013 / dumi - Oct 2, 2013
|I hope to lead an academically demanding life; WHY GEORGIA TECH ?
7 - Like Pahan, I too have a confusion here.... why you say your school is demanding? What sort of...
Undergraduatekumku - Sep 27, 2013 / dumi - Oct 2, 2013
|One's duty to keep the promise; Personal essay/ When I challenged a belief or idea
2 - The students expected the refectory to enhance the quality and presentation of the meals it provided. ...
Undergraduateaslikehoya - Oct 2, 2013 / dumi - Oct 2, 2013
|"The team wouldn't be the same without you" - Being a part of a team! ; Common App
Undergraduatescroan - Sep 29, 2013 / scroan - Oct 1, 2013
|I like to think that I'm just here; COMMON APP: Past, Present, and Future
2 - I wouldn't know how to describe myself ((no comma here) in the sense of usual identified traits. When it...
Undergraduatejennieta - Oct 1, 2013 / Avatar - Oct 1, 2013
|My Hampton University Autobiography Essay; 'As a young girl I always had big dreams...'
2 - nice essay! I'm just not sure whether you should say so many stuff about your grades/courses and extracurriculars, cause...
Undergraduatezammettdamali - Sep 30, 2013 / kumku - Sep 30, 2013
|work experience/ extracurricular activity : Princeton/Stanford
Undergraduatesarthakjain - Sep 4, 2013 / roxy481 - Sep 30, 2013
|Stanford Essay: Blood Is Thickest - What matters to you, and why?
4 - your essay is ideal for reading but not quite appealing to the readers. however you do have potential to...
UndergraduateXevoz - Sep 29, 2013 / junisha rai - Sep 30, 2013
|My trip to Nigeria was an eye-opener; U Florida
Undergraduatejosibodu7596 - Sep 29, 2013 / Sweet lily - Sep 30, 2013
|You are nothing but a failure!; Describe the world you come from - UC's PS
Undergraduatektang96 - Sep 14, 2013 / dumi - Sep 30, 2013
|Favorite Movie/ source of inspiration/weekend/compliment; QuestBridge National Match
Undergraduatekhanhluong - Sep 6, 2013 / paul2752 - Sep 30, 2013
|'pursue knowledge, not a job' - Why Brown?
7 - thank u!...
Undergraduatebells - Sep 29, 2013 / bells - Sep 29, 2013
|Stanford Roommate Letter - Schnitzel and Sauerkraut
UndergraduateVin - Sep 14, 2013 / Xevoz - Sep 29, 2013
|Fly Firefly; SUNY School application
Undergraduatefrancesca_dileo - Sep 25, 2013 / francesca_dileo - Sep 29, 2013
|I'm not going to tell you I'm the smartest; Yale Writing Supplement
Undergraduatecarolinemm - Sep 28, 2013 / carolinemm - Sep 29, 2013
|NATURE TRAIL; Environment where I am content
Undergraduatedooleyc - Sep 24, 2013 / dumi - Sep 29, 2013
|UNIQUE INDIVIDUAL; Personal Statement Essay for Exchange Program
3 - thank you for you reply, beside evidence to support my argument, what do you think about the overall content?...
Undergraduateemilia putri - Sep 25, 2013 / emilia putri - Sep 29, 2013
|SINGLE PARENT HOME; College Admission Essay.
Undergraduatethelegendary - Sep 28, 2013 / josibodu7596 - Sep 29, 2013
|"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest"; SOP for UK universities
2 - .... let's try with direct speech ;) The environment I grew up didn't take education so seriously. ...
Undergraduateumer43646001 - Sep 28, 2013 / Pahan - Sep 29, 2013
|TOP in my college list ; Georgia Tech - Attraction and Contribution
2 - Ever since I realized that math and physics are where my passion lays, Georgia Tech had the top...
Undergraduatejsk_jin - Sep 28, 2013 / Pahan - Sep 29, 2013
|Incident/Time of FAILURE; How did it affect you (COMMON)
Undergraduatelengyicau - Sep 26, 2013 / Pahan - Sep 28, 2013
|My dream career, FILMMAKING; FSU Essay / Global awarness characteristic
2 - .... I think you better touch more general aspects because you are talking about global situations. In this...
Undergraduatebuzz123 - Sep 28, 2013 / Pahan - Sep 28, 2013
|Help others achieve their dreams and you will achieve yours; OT PS
Undergraduatembaker8016 - Sep 15, 2013 / dumi - Sep 28, 2013
|my weight and how it has affected me; Personal Narrative
3 - Well.... I like what you've written. For me it sounds as if you genuinely expressed yourself. It's touchy and...
Undergraduatefaburizu - Sep 10, 2013 / dumi - Sep 28, 2013
|Leadership is essential for all aspects and situations in life; FSU - LEADERSHIP
3 - .... this sounds as if this is a complete definition of leadership. However, in my view, it is...
Undergraduateashfsu - Sep 9, 2013 / dumi - Sep 28, 2013
|NURSING is an exciting and dynamic field ; PS Northeastern U/Direct Entry MSN Program
3 - The nursing field is an exciting and dynamic field that is rapidly developing and establishing its identity as...
Undergraduatealexs8 - Sep 9, 2013 / dumi - Sep 28, 2013
|"A sanctuary for the pursuit of science"; Why Carnegie Mellon? Research
3 - I think you do a fantastic job being specific to Carnegie Mellon -- at first glance it seemed as...
Undergraduateyosh503037 - Sep 13, 2013 / deathstroke - Sep 27, 2013
|My willingness to be at a loss. Mit essay
4 - I feel pretty similarly about your response. I think you have a lot of potential with this topic, but...
Undergraduateyosh503037 - Sep 13, 2013 / deathstroke - Sep 27, 2013
|I filled up the white space; UChicago Supplemental Essay: Arch-Nemesis
3 - I really liked the idea behind this essay, and your execution is pretty solid, too. I would try to...
UndergraduateNicolet501 - Sep 24, 2013 / deathstroke - Sep 27, 2013
|Why I ride: University of Michigan Supplement
4 - I honestly really like your explanation of why you choose to ride. One thing I would change, though, is...
Undergraduateandrewmiura - Sep 23, 2013 / deathstroke - Sep 27, 2013
|US History class; U Florida Freshman ;creating or developing a solution to a problem
Undergraduatejosibodu7596 - Sep 9, 2013 / josibodu7596 - Sep 27, 2013
|Surrounded by nutrition; Cornell CALS - experiences/interest in Nutrition
Undergraduateandreaf96 - Sep 7, 2013 / dumi - Sep 27, 2013
|Life is about giving back as much as you have taken; COMMON GOOD; Bowdoin College
2 - Well.... I see a poor connection between the first two lines and this one. Common good generally...
Undergraduatethisweirdkid - Sep 7, 2013 / dumi - Sep 27, 2013
|Not everyone's belief is the same; Texas A&M U
Undergraduateysgrlj - Sep 23, 2013 / ysgrlj - Sep 26, 2013
|EMT appreciation day; Randolph Macon/ EXPERIENCE THAT IMPACTED ME
3 - This essay's topic was to choose a time when an experience impacts you. Many ideas came to mind, but...
Undergraduatezammettdamali - Sep 26, 2013 / zammettdamali - Sep 26, 2013
|World of esoteric ideas; Place or environment where you are perfectly content/ Common App
UndergraduateCallMeDoctor - Sep 24, 2013 / haru1996 - Sep 26, 2013
|SONGS/NOVELS/OUTDOOR ACTIVITIES; Tell us about something you do for the pleasure of it
2 - Dearkaustubh if I were you , I would not concentrate on just playing, I am sure you have other...
Undergraduatekaustubh1911 - Sep 26, 2013 / marmaria - Sep 26, 2013
|Growing up in an Asian-American home, I always felt different; DIVERSITY ESSAY
3 - while they kept having theirs on. well... here, your first sentence sounds as if the situation...
Undergraduatekaybee - Sep 7, 2013 / dumi - Sep 26, 2013
|I normally do not make a habit of relying on people; QUESTBRIDGE BIO-needs cut down!
UndergraduateChantal - Sep 17, 2013 / Chantal - Sep 26, 2013
|What is fashion to me, and why do I like fasion?; PERFECT CANDIDA for FIT
Undergraduatebunnyhl - Sep 25, 2013 / dumi - Sep 26, 2013
|Reading glasses; UW Madison; Something gone unnoticed
Undergraduateschjil - Sep 7, 2013 / dumi - Sep 26, 2013
|Scientific Exploration (Caltech): Being Lost in Exploring
2 - quiet a good essay..but you did not mention thoroughly how it excited you and in return what you did..you...
Undergraduateyosh503037 - Sep 13, 2013 / bar08 - Sep 26, 2013
|MY FATHER; Princeton Essay-talk about a person who has influenced you
3 - Even though my father no more lives with me, he still occupies the bigger portion of my heart...
Undergraduatepaul2752 - Sep 8, 2013 / dumi - Sep 26, 2013
|"You're lucky that you're a Mexican"; Questbridge Biographical
UndergraduateFERNANDOCP - Sep 22, 2013 / dumi - Sep 26, 2013
|'never give up' Uw-Milwaukee - life experiences, talents, commitments and(or) interest
3 - good comments by sarthakjain! ... Improve presentation of this idea; All my life, I grew up with...
Undergraduatekenziekalwitz - Sep 3, 2013 / dumi - Sep 25, 2013
|"Good Girl" and the "Gentle Child"; Questbridge Biographical Essay
7 - "Mom and Dad will be the shield, Protecting you through all your life Because you are Daddy girl, The...
Undergraduatekhanhluong - Sep 22, 2013 / vynguyen1995 - Sep 25, 2013
|Life's been good to me so far; Personal Statement ;PA programs, needs 1/3 reduction
Undergraduatesurfermgad - Sep 20, 2013 / surfermgad - Sep 25, 2013
|'more tougher than for freshman' Transfer Supplement Essay SUNY Old Wesbury - challenges
Undergraduatekayylahhx0 - Sep 24, 2013 / JIMMY0907 - Sep 25, 2013
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