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"I am never go to abroad!" This sentence is what a Japanese friend called Taro in my club said


wei 1 / 2  
Feb 16, 2010   #1
briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities(150 words or fewer)

"I am never go to abroad!" This sentence is what a Japanese friend called Taro in my club said. Although he's not good at English, I learned an important thing from him.

My club is a volunteer group organizing various events for foreign trainees coming to Japan for international internships. We often hang out with them and hold parties so that they can enjoy their lives in Japan. Taro, who cannot speak English well but really wants to communicate with trainees, always tries hard to make him understood. Whenever I see him speak English, he uses gestures with his whole body and seems to be filled with passion. Surprisingly, he can mostly tell what he wants to mean after all.

Looking at him, I realized a vital thing; whether enthusiastic you are is more significant than if you can speak the foreign language well when communicating with foreigners.
msdenna 2 / 6  
Feb 16, 2010   #2
We often hang out with them

This sounds a little informal/slang for my liking.

whether enthusiastic you are is more significant

Not sure what you mean here, is it just a typo, a word left out? Other then these two things, everything else looks good to me. Puncuation looks good and so on. Hope this was helpful.
OP wei 1 / 2  
Feb 17, 2010   #3
Thank you for informing me of a mistake.

I should change the sentence into "whether you are enthuiastic".
linmark 2 / 328 7  
Feb 17, 2010   #4
We often hang out with them and hold parties so that they can enjoy their lives in Japan.

Besides this, what did YOU (not we) do for the club? The prompt asked for you to elaborate on your "activities." You wrote more about what you learned from the club. Sorry, but this is for Cornell so you will have to make it more impressive.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Feb 17, 2010   #5
This sentence was spoken by my Japanese friend, Taro. in my club Although he's not good at English, I learned an important thing lesson from him.

Taro, who cannot speak English well but really wants to communicate with trainees, always tries hard to make himself understood. -- good sentence!!

Surprisingly, people can mostly tell what he wants to express after all.

Looking at him, I realized a vital truth about communication; whether you are enthusiastic is more significant than whether you can speak the foreign language well when communicating with people of another culture.

:-)
OP wei 1 / 2  
Feb 19, 2010   #6
Thank you for correcting my essay and giving me advice!


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