"Directions: The Matrix in Computer Science"
"Ethnic Identity in Graeco-Roman Egypt"
"Weird Sisters and Fairy Queens: Women in Shakespearean Drama"
These are the reasons I want to go to college. College is a way to get a broader perspective on the issues surrounding me, within me, and issues to come to me. Being educated is a way to express yourself; this is the appeal of college. I want to be able to have discussions about anything, from sociology to microbiology to pop culture. It is not the title of a degree that makes me yearn to go to college, but rather the knowledge and understanding of things which right now seem so far past what I can understand. College teaches you that you don't know everything, and that there are certain things you aren't ever going to understand. This is very important for being able to be a true academic. Knowing the limits of knowledge, is in many ways more important than the knowledge itself because it gives guidelines. This is not to be confused with academic apathy, the goal is to continue to broaden the realm of things you understand- however working within a frame of reference is important to understand how to continue. College offers an opportunity to hear from the minds who actually came up with many of the theories, wrote the books, performed the piece; which is invaluable to understand their process and will inspire me to adapt my academic or artistic processes.
To transition so fluidly from academic discussions to social interactions is something which is invaluable. This is the true appeal of college. Living among people who are both your academic peers and your friends is something that is unique to the college experience. The line between academic and social situations blurs, so that the two can be interchanged, which allows for a new kind of dialogue to open- the dialogue of intellectualism.
I like the listing of topics/books at the beginning, but you need to elaborate on that. It is definitely an interesting way to start off, but simply saying 'these are the reasons I want to go to college' leaves the reader with a vague longing sense, as though there should be more to come, though it only gets vaguer from there.
Get rid of 'this is the appeal of college' as you have already stated it above.
The semi-colon usage at the end of the second paragraph needs to be changed. Just change the '; which is invaluable' to 'It is invaluable'.
You have a strong foundation, but I would recommend shortening some of these sentences. Some just go on an on and eventually convolute the ideas of your essay, which is bad. The good news is, you have thematically a good essay, though grammatically, it is somewhat struggling, like a tired swimmer nearly back to shore. Bad simile, I know, but you get the idea. You are almost there.
Good luck.
thank you so much! I have done some of the edits you have recommended and may get repost an edited version which I hope you will take a look at!
I don't think you have to start with "These are the reasons I want to go to college" because they probably know what the essay is going to be about. It is a little rambly but it has good points.
