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Essay on academic interests - Kimchi, Kiwi, and Made in China :)


qasderwdw 9 / 36 1  
Nov 13, 2012   #1
A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.

When I was five years old, I left my familiar world of Kimchi, Choco Pie, and Korean candy to be thrown into a world of unpredictable happenings. Since then, my life has been a continuous cycle of moving and adjusting. Such abrupt changes in environment brought confusion and fear, but the wealth of experience I gained through these travels has molded me into a flexible and stronger person.

My first destination was New Zealand, the land of sheep, cows, and white people. Here I was exposed to a very free and wild culture compared to Korea's rigid societal values. While children my age in Korea were already memorizing the multiplication tables, I was busy playing on the trampoline and enjoying delightful dairy products. I loved the kiwi fruit, developed a "Kiwi" accent, and was soon enough called a "Kiwi". When I thought I had found my place in this foreign land, it was time to move on- to the mysterious land of China.

China was very different from our previous settlement. The people were rude, and the streets were dirty and crowded. It was a shock when I first encountered the infamous Chinese bathroom: no doors, no toilet seat, only a mere hole in the ground. Unlike in New Zealand, it took a while before I became accustomed to the ways of this foreign land. I must admit that I initially felt superior to these people of rudimentary manners. It was only when I tried to appreciate their culture that I started to understand them. Without knowing it, I became so assimilated in Chinese society that I found myself behaving like them- I soon ate, talked, and looked like a Chinese.

Clad in my "Made in China" clothes, I moved to Thailand in hopes of receiving a well rounded education. The Thai people were quiet, polite, and respectful. One of the things I hear the most here is, "Jai yen," a Thai phrase meaning "calm down." This has been a challenge for a Korean like me, as my culture emphasizes "Bali, bali", or "hurry, hurry." Although the Korean side of me constantly wants to shout "Faster," I am trying to become accustomed to the slow and calm nature of the Thai people.

Being exposed to such diverse cultures has undeniably allowed me to see a wider view of the world. I have made countless mistakes because of my ignorance of others' values, but they gave me opportunities to grow and learn. As a prospective college student, I am excited to have the chance to share my imperfect yet meaningful experiences that challenged me to see beyond my narrow set of codes. I can proudly tell my colleagues that my life as a wandering youth was definitely worth leaving my delicious Korean snacks.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 13, 2012   #2
Since then, my life has been a continuous cyclechallenged by a sequence of moving and adjusting. Such abrupt changes in environment brought confusion and fear, but it also rewarded me withthea wealth of experience I gained through these travels hasthat molded me into a flexible and stronger personality .

While children of my age in Korea were already memorizing the multiplication tables, I was busy playing on the trampoline and enjoying delightful dairy products.

Although the Korean side of me constantly wants to shout "Faster," I am tryingtried to become accustomed to the slow and calm nature of the Thai people.

Being exposed to such diverse cultures has undeniably allowed me to see a wider view of the worldbroaden my perspectives and appreciate cultural diversity .

I must say that you have presented the answer very creatively.... Great Job and I loved every line of your essay!
Good Luck!!!!!!!!!
OP qasderwdw 9 / 36 1  
Nov 13, 2012   #3
Weee! Thank you SO much for your feeback :) It really helps.
This essay is actually due this thursday... so I hope all goes well!
I actually looked over some of your other posts and I saw that you said very helpful things to other people as well.
I really appreciate your effort to better others and my essay!
- Sol Bee
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 14, 2012   #4
Glad to know that my comments are helpful : )
You are pretty creative and I love your simple style of writing which is very interesting and more conceivable. So I thought I must try my best to help you with the last concluding para. This is just for your thoughts, but what you've written is also very good :


Being exposed to such diverse cultures, I had a great opportunity to broaden my perspectives; I made countless mistakes in this journey due to my ignorance of others' values, but all those experiences taught me valuable lessons and helped me grow and mature as a person. I am no more a narrow minded lad whose world rotates around himself. Instead I am someone with a depth. I now appreciate the human diversity and believe in co-existance. As a prospective college student, I am excited to share my imperfect yet meaningful experiences of the past that challenged me to see beyond my narrow set of codes. I can proudly tell my colleagues that my life as a wandering youth was definitely worth leaving my delicious Korean snacks.

I can proudly tell my colleagues that my life as a wandering youth was definitely worth leaving my delicious Korean snacks.

----------- lovely.... simply beautiful : )
OP qasderwdw 9 / 36 1  
Nov 14, 2012   #5
Final Product! I think I'm going to submit it like this, but I'm just showing what changes I made.
Thank you dumi for helping- I took in a lot of your ideas and suggestions.
Oh and I thought it funny that you thought I were a "lad" hahaha
I'm actually a 18 year old Korean girl :)
Thank you again. I wish you luck on your Toefl examination! (no i'm not a stalker)

A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.

When I was five years old, I left my familiar world of Kimchi, Choco Pie, and Korean candy to be thrown into a world of unpredictable happenings. Since then, I have been constantly challenged by a sequence of moving and adjusting. Such abrupt changes in environment brought confusion and fear, but it also rewarded me with a wealth of experience that molded me into a flexible and stronger person.

My first destination was New Zealand, the land of infinitely many sheep, cows, and white people. Here I was exposed to a very free and wild culture compared to Korea's rigid societal values. While children of my age in Korea were already memorizing the multiplication tables, I was busy playing on the trampoline and enjoying strange new dairy products. Before long, I found myself completely absorbed in this unusual, frightening and exciting new culture. I loved the kiwi fruit, developed a "Kiwi" accent, and was soon enough called a "Kiwi." I quickly adapted to New Zealand, and made it home. But after two years, I had to move on- to the mysterious land of China.

China was very different from my previous settlement. The people were rude, and the streets were dirty and crowded. It was a shock when I first encountered the infamous Chinese bathroom: no doors, no toilet seat, just a hole in the ground. Unlike in New Zealand, it took a while before I became accustomed to the ways of this foreign land. I must admit that I initially felt superior to these people of rudimentary manners. It was only when I tried to appreciate their culture that I started to understand them. Without knowing it, I became so assimilated in Chinese society that I found myself behaving like them- I soon ate, talked, and looked like a Chinese.

Clad in my "Made in China" clothes, I moved to Thailand in hopes of receiving a well rounded education. The Thai people were quiet, polite, and respectful. One of the things I hear the most here is, "Jai yen," a Thai phrase meaning "calm down." This has been a challenge for a Korean like me, as my culture emphasizes "ppalli-ppalli," or "hurry, hurry." Although the Korean side of me constantly wants to shout "Faster," I am trying to become accustomed to the slow and calm nature of the Thai people.

Being exposed to such diverse cultures, I had a great opportunity to broaden my perspectives. I made countless mistakes in this journey due to my ignorance of others' values, but all those events taught me valuable lessons that helped me to grow and mature. As a prospective college student, I am excited to have the chance to share my imperfect yet meaningful experiences that challenged me to see beyond my narrow worldview. I can proudly tell my colleagues that my life as a wandering youth was definitely worth leaving my delicious Korean snacks.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 14, 2012   #6
Ohhhhhhhhh... sorry... gender confusion ...lol

And i'm not preparing for TOEFL either. I did it in 2010, the time I joined this forum.... Good Luck with your application :)
You'll be accepted for sure : )
princedynasty 15 / 57 4  
Nov 14, 2012   #7
I love your exciting adventure. And I'm a Chocopie fanatic. :D:D. Good luck to you and thank you for your inspiring essay, it reminds me of the time I stayed in Thailand, so memorable. Thailand people are indeed friendly and courteous.


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