An accident at school. My role model has always been my mother.

the most influential person in the world - my admission essay

They were telling me to hit it again and again...

My legs were falling apart, it was the strangest feeling I've ever had. I barely could feel the same. Once I realized that I was doing something that one should not do, I saw my mind keep telling me no but my body keep saying I want it. I really just wanted to rewind time to go to an island of my very own, where I go in, close my eyes, breathe deep, and the world goes away.

Something dark and deep came through my mind and kept telling me to bounce back where I really belong. Everywhere I go there were lots of people looking at me in the most strangest way, looked like they were ready to call the school principal. Or is it just me? Campus security was around the corner ready to bring me to the principals office. But then I was just paranoid. At the sudden I was already in my dorm having all types of effects that marijuana gives you. At the moment all I was thinking was "What if I get caught? What if someone tells on me?"

I remember my grandmother used to tell me "People who do bad things will eventually caught red-handed" That day became the reality, I couldn't wake up from it, still couldn't believe what I did that day. Eventually the school officials gave me an in school suspension. I took responsibility for what I did that day and made sure to keep doing what I supposed to do.

I grew up in a very big family. My grandmother raised 10 children. They are all very caring and generous people to the society. In the thoughts of mine, I am a very privileged person to grow up in such family. My role model has always been my mother. She is a strong women who doesn't give up on anything, she do whatever it takes to bring joy and happiness to my family. Unfortunately, my father died when I was 7 years old. Those days were the toughest moments of my family. My mother always used to praise as I would become one of the most influential person in the world. I would do whatever it takes to make sure my mothers wish come true.

It happened when I was in tenth grade; first year in the United States. It actually helped me to improve on the further decisions and most definitely learn from my mistake.I realize, now, it doesn't matter whether what decision you make there will always be a consequence at the end; the only important thing is when you come to a crossroad you will be the one who chooses the route and always think what that route could lead you to.

Unibileg, this is one essay that should not be focused on you are the topic of the essay. Your topic should center upon highlighting the positive influence that a person, not necessarily your mother, has had on your life. As long as that person has inspired you to become a better person or do well in life, then that person is influential to you. Not the world, the influence of this person only has to extend to you. Do not exaggerate the prompt.

There are inconsistencies in this essay, such as in paragraph 4. You spoke of your grandmother raising 10 children and then suddenly pivot to speaking about your mother. What happened there? Did you want to talk about your grandmother and then suddenly change your mind to a talk about your mother instead? Either way, the overall topic and presentation of the essay is not what the topic is instructing you to do so you have to start over with a new essay.

Think about a person whose words of wisdom or treatment of you taught you something about becoming a better person. This can also be a person who has a nice attitude or exemplary character traits that you wish you absorb into your own personality. Or even a person whom you met only once, but had such an impact upon your mindset that you decided to change something about yourself because you were inspired by this person to do so.

Basically, the essay needs to focus on a 50/50 or 75/25 ratio of presentation. The larger number would represent how much of the presentation the influential person would occupy and the lower number, would be about the influence upon you in the essay. You are always a part of all the essays that you write for the college app. Your participation in the theme though, depends upon who the prompt wishes to have you discuss..