Hey, I have a couple different ideas for Williams College's prompt and just wanted to see if anyone had any thoughts or pointers. Here's one of them. Oh, and the prompt is: Imagine looking through a window at any environment that is particularly significant to you. Reflect on the scene, paying close attention to the relation between what you are seeing and why it is meaningful to you. Please limit your response to 300 words.
The best feeling in the world is right before you go on stage to perform. The instant before you step onto that stage, your entire stomach is full of butterflies -- it feels like the thousands of winged creatures are going to lift you away. When you walk on stage, however, those tiny little annoyances disappear in the immediately and are replaced with a feeling of unmatchable excitement. Some of the best memories of my life have been made on stage, and that is why the scene most significant to me is looking through a window into an auditorium.
When I am on stage, everything else disappears. Playing my part, I don't have to worry about the big AP Physics test tomorrow or next week's chair test in band; the only things in the world are my fellow actors and me. Time flies as I go from scene to scene, from act to act. Before I know it, the play has ended and it's time for me to step back into the real world again. However, when I step into the world this time, it is with the knowledge that I just finished something epic, something that will stay ingrained in my memory for as long as I shall live.
Just like right before I stepped on stage, my stomach is full of butterflies as I prepare myself to step offstage. However, those butterflies that used to be little annoyances have transformed themselves into tiny presents. This time, instead of resisting their pull, I allow the butterflies to float me away, not a care in the world. That is why my favorite environment is looking at a stage in an auditorium, because acting and being onstage makes me feel like I'm floating on the wings of a thousand butterflies.
When you walk on stage, however, those tiny little annoyances disappear and are immediately replaced with a feeling of unmatchable excitement.
the only things in the world are my fellow actors and I .
This time, instead of resisting their pull, I allow the butterflies them to float me away, not a care in the world. (You use the word butterfly alot, to much repetition will ruin the strength of the last sentence.)
That is why my favorite environment is looking atthe stage in an auditorium, because acting and being onstage makes me feel like I'm floating on the wings of a thousand butterflies. (Looking at a stage is an activity not an environment)
Hope this helped a little.
You mentioned the butterflies twice, and it is probably better to only mention them once.
Also, tis prompt seems to call for imagery words -- words that make the reader see images, smell smells, hear sounds. Can you find room for some imagery?
