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Addressing with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to UChicago?


Collegecrab 1 / -  
Dec 23, 2018   #1

Why UChicago Learning, Community, Future



Prompt: How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to UChicago?

Essay: When I look back on my life, what I realize is that my main moments of growth were not comfortable; they usually felt a bit stressful at the time. But they pushed me outside of my comfort zone and introduced me to new ideas and perspectives, some of which I wasn't even aware of. Be it from the uncomfortable and stressful nature of the IB programme which pushes you to think more critically or the rigorous physics olympiad program which taught me the value of self-learning and hard work. I want my university experience to be similar.

I don't want to go to a university where I will focus completely on physics, something which I can already do myself and will pursue further in graduate school. In university, I want an experience that will push me to my intellectual limits, one which will challenge my way of thinking, and one which will strengthen me intellectually.

What drew me to UChicago was its unique style apparent from its weird essays, tough-and stressful as I have been told-Core Curriculum, its lack of pre-professional programs, and its dedication to the pursuit of knowledge and freedom of speech. The overall impression I receive is a world-class intellectually demanding curriculum and community where I can join in on rigorous debates and discussions both inside the small classrooms and with a community united by a common passion for learning.

If that's so, my wishes of being intellectually challenged and strengthened in and outside the classroom for a brutal 4 years of university will be fulfilled and I look forward to my experience.

Thank you all in advance :)
MLPridemore 1 / 1  
Dec 23, 2018   #2
put a comma after critically and before or in the first paragraph.

Put an a before university and after In in your 2nd paragraph.
In a university, I want ....

I would expand your 2nd paragraph by how UChicago will test those limits you have.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4773  
Dec 24, 2018   #3
Your essay borders on the arrogant and snobbish in this particular line: I don't want to go to a university where I will focus completely on physics, something which I can already do myself and will pursue further in graduate school.

Please remember that you are applying to college. If you believe and are convinced that you already know everything there is to learn about Physics and college is a mere waste of time because you will learn more in graduate school, then why are you applying at all to this university? Take that line out to remove the arrogance of your statement. It is expected that you will focus your academic life on the study of Physics. What you do after classes and the completion of your homework and other academic requirements is up to you, but your focus, academically, will be on physics and related studies.

The overall essay is acceptable without that offensive line in place. It is not a statement that will be taken well by the reviewer. If you want to keep the essence of that line, then you have to rephrase it to sound less arrogant and more respectful of the benefits of college study, the university you are applying to, and the reviewer.


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