An Amateur Photographer- Common App.

I'm not a really good writer, so I can really use some corrections and advice.
Thanks! :D

please elaborate on one of your activities. (150 words or less)

"Pictures are worth a thousand words," is one of my favorite sayings because it's true. At age 15, I fell in love with photography. I love how a photograph could paint a story or keep a cherished memory alive. When I found out my high school offered black and white photography, I excitedly signed up for it. When classes started, I was given an old fashion camera with black and white film that could not be exposed to light. It was also my first time developing film in a dark room. The experience was overwhelming. Since then, I've gotten a Nikon L100. I wouldn't call myself a professional photographer, but I hope someday in the future, I can take a photograph that would make people smile.

I think "A picture is worth a thousands words" is the correct quote. You say it's true but don't offer anything in support of it. How do you "paint" a story?

This is basic cursory examination and you're not hitting the explanation of a gray saying even with another gray saying. It suggests something is off to me, like perchance you didn't give it serious thought.

I agree; it is bad to start with a phrase that is so common. It would be okay if you focused the essay on thoughtful consideration of the ways in which a picture is worth words... but that is not really what the essay is about.

this might make a nice first sentence:
When I found out my high school offered a course in black and white photography, I excitedly signed up for it. ----> as you continue to write, dig deep and tell about the truth you've found in photography. Tell us about the moment of squeezing the button, the significance that photography has compared to other arts, etc.

Dig deeper!