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'To Have an Aspiration' - TRANSFER ESSAY


jennieme 1 / -  
Mar 31, 2012   #1
"Why do you want to transfer?" is the topic. I'm not a great writer. Thanks so much for revising!!!

To Have an Aspiration

What serves as your purpose for studying at a university? As I evaluate how I would approach this question, it is preferably sensible to retract from an immediate answer. Pondering for a response, I first thought about my father. In the pursuit of bettering his future, he immigrated to America at the age of eighteen. He started out with a job as a busboy at a restaurant in lower Manhattan, catering to customers and working from early morning till pitch-dark, late at night. Although for a while he has undergone trials and tribulations, his hard work and personal dedication to achieve that infamous "American Dream" eventually have him become successful. His work ethics, his maturity, and his strength from a young age define an undeniably compelling role model. I look up to him even today, as his examples proceed to inspire and motivate me to go for it.

My decision to transfer university developed through a process of self-evaluation since freshman year at Syracuse University. I remember the period when the fresh beginning of college made my emotions succumb to a mix of anxiety and excitement. Eager raced through my mind upon deciding which courses to take, evaluating community service opportunities, and meeting new people. Whirling in my mind are many suggestive routes and endless possibilities branched from my preconception of the college experiences. Through my one-year journey of being a freshman and now a sophomore in college, I evaluated a better sense of self and an environment that would help advance my academic abilities and develop my personal role. Although my current institution does provide a great pre-medicine program, however I want to study at a setting that I can correspond well. I have decided that transferring to another university is the ideal choice to gain experiences that would help enrich my academic career. There will be a better potential for me to broaden my perspectives in terms of challenging myself with new experiences, finding internships of my match, and connecting with people of distinct diversity. My father used to tell me; "learning also means acquiring a discourse with people, not just mastering a body of knowledge." His words kept me thinking if the school I am currently attending is helping me achieve this. I hope by transferring to a school prevalently with a city-based setting, I will be able to build interactions with people indiscriminate by age, gender, socioeconomic-background, sexuality, religion, and the list goes on. Ultimately, transferring will pave way not only for me to cultivate a sense of social awareness and understanding, but also to both educational success and future preparedness.

As a pre-medicine student, I have always been a 'science junkie' as early as I can remember. In fact, my 5th grade Science Fair Project on the "Osmosis and Diffusion in Egg" was what brought visual attention to how surreal chemical reactions are. I remember setting an egg into a vinegar solution and then the next day, the shell of the egg completely disappeared and the egg itself became enlarged! I became so fascinated, and indeed spellbound by the art of Chemistry. I am curious to understand its mechanics and experiencing the thrill of its challenges at University. Studying medicine offers knowledge so powerful and it becomes very useful when further applying it when its main intention is to help people. Those who study or have studied medicine are genuinely compassionate and inspiring people. Although mastering medicine is a long journey and requires an overall dedication to time and effort, I am honored to be following the footsteps of excellent doctors. I hope to build a credible foundation through transferring to a different school. I believe by to studying at a challenging university, there are faculties who are great scholars and mentors that can guide me through my academic endeavor. In addition, such an institution would have connection to renowned health facilities that I can engage in hands-on experiences. My motive is clear-I'd rather be no doctor than a mediocre one.

Above all, I have envisioned my alma mater to be where I have become proud of my accomplishments. My ideal university is one that can provide an array of first-hand experiences to both cultivate interests within my academic study, as well as stimulate visual inspirations for my inner love for art. Thus at best, transferring is the right route for me. I am confident that I can be provided with the kinds of resources I initially seek. In the end, I hope to foster my ambition, which is to eventually become a qualified health professional candidate. All in all, I believe the best can happen through personal dedication. As they say, "like father, like daughter." With the privilege of receiving a college education, I eagerly work to my best abilities and fruitfully seek out different experiences offered at university. Each day is a new beginning, as the cycle of time hastily revamps itself. Pacing up with time, I work hard to become a worthy pre-medicine student. I always put a lot of pressure on myself. It's like competing with myself, but hey, that's what makes life worth living. By the end of the day, I smile knowing I've done my best. To be a first generation to have a formal education in America, I know that the scope is much greater, and there are far more to experience. Yet, along with becoming an educated thinker, what I value most is remaining my humble self as I continue to embark on with my college career.

EF_Susan - / 2,365 12  
Apr 3, 2012   #2
" What serves as your purpose for studying at a university?"
As I evaluate how I would approach this question, it is preferably I FIND IT sensible to retract from an immediate answer.
Pondering for a response,
Although for a while he has undergone trials and tribulations, his hard work and personal dedication to achieve that infamous "American Dream" eventually have HELPED him become successful

.EagerNESS raced through my mind upon deciding which courses to take,
Although my current institution does provide a great pre-medicine program, however I want to study at IN a setting that I WITH WHICH I can correspond well.

I hope by transferring to a school prevalently with a city-based setting,
I will be able to build interactions with people indiscriminate by OF age, gender, socioeconomic-background, sexuality, religion, and the list goes on ETC..
My motive is clear-I'd rather be no doctor than a mediocre one. NICELY PUT :)

You ARE a great writer; my only advice would be to organize and structure a bit more clearly and do not use more adjectives than necessary :)

Good job and good luck.


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