Choose an issue of importance to you-the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope-and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation. (This is my first draft.. pretty much the first thing that popped into my mind I typed, so i'm sure it could use some editing! Any opinions would help! I decided last minute to apply to A&M! I can only hope that my last minute essays are enough to at least get me into Blinn team! )
Entering into high school is a life changing, impressionable experience. It's a time in your life where you truly feel like your going somewhere, finally growing up. But for most, its also a very nerve racking experience. The school is ten times bigger, you hardly recognize anyone, and the work seems to be monumentally more challenging. Freshmen often stumble around a bit at first as they try to adapt to higher expectations. In theory, these first year struggles should be a step to learning how to balance responsibilities- something that a parent or teacher could easily offer advice about. But in reality, freshman year is a drastic plunge into the world of judgment.
The locker room was brutal. Stepping foot trough those secret gym doors was like walking into another universe. I was immediately assaulted with the constant hum of gossip and fake laughter. 30 girls were packed into the bathroom, all shoving for a space in front of the mirrors, or an empty socket to plug their blow dryers and staighteners in. Mascara wands and bottles of concealer whirled frantically in front of each girl's plastic face. As soon as one girl, hair fried beyond repair, left, she was replaced by another goopy-lipped, raccoon-eyed Barbie. Before I had entered into this world, I had never been unhappy with my weight, or my big calves, or my deep-set eyes. All of sudden though, nearly everything about everyone was imperfect.
I was able to handle these new pressures of appearance fairly well. I conformed to what the high school society demanded of me in a nonchalant way, choosing to concentrate on my close friends then impressing the masses. My good friend Ashley, however, was no so successful. I soon noticed that she wouldn't eat at lunch. In fact, I never saw her eat at all. She had begun to starve herself so that she would stay skinny. Her weight loss had won her quite a few new male companions, which encouraged her to eat less and less. And finally one day- her body couldn't take it and she ended up in the hospital.
After that terrible day we all vowed to never let someone else affect the way we viewed ourselves. As a senior about to graduate, I can honestly say I have seen no change in the way that people demean each other. If anything, I see that this is almost an epidemic- affecting the physical and even mental health of billions of people throughout the world. There are countless ways that the media influences our self-image. Television and magazines make perfection seem necessary. As many ways as society has found to make us feel insecure about our bodies, it has found even more ways to suck every dollar from our fragile, 'flawed' world. The money making industry has taken the delicate state of our self perception, and twisted us all into something ugly and deformed.
People around the world spend thousands of dollars to "fix" themselves. Women are obsessed with having a perfect body. Botox, breast implants, nose jobs, liposuction; these are only a few things women are willing to have done to their bodies in order to live up to the world's expectations.
Why are people so obsessed with a perfect appearance? I believe that these ridiculously impossible expectations have made our world much more unstable. It breeds life long depression and anxiety into people who could have otherwise put their efforts and goals into actually advancing society. Money and research of new ways to tweak God's creation could have been put into real human needs such as medicine or helping people with true misfortune.
It seems sad that people do this to each other, when each one of us could admit that it has detrimental affects on our self-worth. Life would be a happier place if people could learn to put their energies into loving themselves and accepting others instead of silly high school-esque tribulations. It seems cliché to say that our beauty resides within, but isn't it the epitome of superficial to say that beauty is all about looks?
I love the flow of your essay, and your emphasis on "beauty." However, I would suggest to replace the word "but" in the beginning of your sentence with something else. Also elaborate on your friend Ashley's experience.
Overall, I loved the topic you picked. BEST OF LUCK WITH A&M!!
