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'becoming an Au Pair in America' - UNC essay


ekreal 6 / 35  
Jan 5, 2012   #1
Prompt:
Tell us about a time when you failed. How did you react? What, if anything, did you learn?


After living with the family for two weeks I already knew it was not going to work out for me. I was simply bored out of my mind. Playing with a kid for 9 hours a day was unbearable, and I knew I could not do it for an entire year.

I graduated from secondary school in Denmark in the summer of 2010. I got a job working over the summer in Bulgaria with a bunch of other young people from all over Scandinavia and Europe, and it was absolutely great. However, when summer was over I had no plans on what to do next. I took some classes in Denmark and had some different jobs, but I was thirsting to explore more. Money on the other hand was not hanging on the trees. So that was when I came upon the idea of becoming an Au Pair in America.

I found an agency that could help me with everything, so that I could start my new adventure. After searching for some time, I found a family that lived near San Francisco in Marin County. They seemed great. They only had one child, a four-year-old girl. We had a lot common interests, the girl was the cutest thing ever and the area sounded amazing. After talking to them via Skype a number of times, we finally decided it was a good match. They had had a lot of troubles with their previous Au Pairs and were therefore excited for me to come and were confident that it would work out just great. Unfortunately it did not.

When I told the family, they were disappointed in me, but I was even more disappointed in myself. I felt like I had let them down. When I chose the family I knew what the job consisted of. I thought it was just the right fit for me. Staying home with a four-year-old girl all day seemed relaxing and fun, just what I needed after so many years of studying. But I guess I did not know myself well enough.

The image you have in your mind of how you see your life has to fit together with the person you are. I forgot that in this case. I am not the type that wants to sit in a house all day and play. I need to go out and explore.

I believe that failing is were you truly learn about yourself and it is an important part of life. This experience taught me a great deal about who I am, what I want and need out of life, in order to be happy. I feel bad for the family, having to go through the process of finding an Au Pair once again. But it was simply something I had to do, and in the end it was the best thing for all of us.

For the last 4 months I have been living with a different family in Marin County. They have three kids and a lot going on. We go biking, hiking and play sports in the yard, not one day is the same, and that is the way I like it.
jadore_lamode68 6 / 37  
Jan 5, 2012   #2
I think the content of your story is very interesting-however the way you convey it with your word choice holds it back from being an AHMAZING essay.

If you used stronger vocabulary, the reader will gain a deeper sense of meaning and make some parts not seem so vague. But over all great job! You told about your summer without giving the conventional-typical format.

Thanks for your feedback and all the best luck!
OP ekreal 6 / 35  
Jan 5, 2012   #3
Thanks, I am international and that's why my vocabulary is not so advanced :/ Anyway you could help with that perhaps?

No prob., thanks for returning the favor!
greeley 6 / 15  
Jan 5, 2012   #4
Its interesting i didnt know what an au pair was
i would develop on this a bit more "I am not the type that wants to sit in a house all day and play. I need to go out and explore"

and also at the introduction.
omo5031 8 / 33  
Jan 5, 2012   #5
I like your essay. I didn't really see anything to correct that wasn't already addressed.
Good luck and hope we both get in:)


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