#1
If there has been some obstacle or "bump in the road," in your academic or personal life, please explain the circumstances.
Similar to many teenagers, my start to high school was not the best, both academically and personally. After learning about the suicide of my uncle, Christopher Corte, my anger towards the world grew by the day. The obstacles I have overcome while in high school taught me that anything is possible. A positive attitude and ambition can go a long way.
"You can do so much better." My parents would often comment about my first few report cards in high school with disappointment in their eyes. Sometimes I would ask myself the same question, but I would not change. I simply let myself be consumed by the bitter thoughts that haunted me since the death of my uncle. It was not until my sophomore year the simplest events made a tremendous impact.
A junior I started becoming good friends with was trying to get admitted into the United States Air Force Academy, telling me that it had been a goal of his since he was in middle school. Day after day I would watch him pour his heart and soul into academics and athletics, constantly worrying about how tough he knew the admission process would be. For some reason, his actions triggered something in my mind that year. In an effort to be more involved, I joined my school's indoor track team. Running gave me an outlet I did not have before. I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself and started taking steps to make my future better.
It is still a shock to me and those that have known me throughout my high school career how much I have transformed in a short period of time. The changes I have made were not easy and did not come over night. I am still suffering the consequences of the poor attitude and performance I demonstrated, knowing that there are many people that have performed well throughout high school that will continue to be a step ahead of me. The difference between the girl that let obstacles discourage her and me is that I will keep trying no matter what obstacles life throws at me in an effort to achieve my goals. My friend did end up getting admitted into the U.S. Air Force Academy, further convincing me that anything is possible.
#2
Why did you choose to apply to UCF?
After moving to Florida last summer and seeing all the opportunities for post-secondary education there are, I became convinced that continuing my education in Florida would be the best option for me. Academics and extracurricular activities have been a huge part of my top college choice being narrowed down to the University of Central Florida. I feel that UCF has a lot to offer me and that I also have a lot to offer the program.
The variety of majors and programs offered at UCF is the main reason this school became so appealing to me. Since I am aspiring to be a journalism major but will most likely minor or double major in another subject, it is comforting to know that UCF has many different options for every type of student. It seems like helping every student is genuinely a priority for the staff.
In addition to UCF's outstanding academic reputation, there are an endless amount of ways to get involved in the school through sports and other clubs. I am very passionate about running track and field and cross country, which intensified my interest in UCF because my coach that ran as a Knight talks very highly of the athletic program. Getting involved in other clubs such as the campus newspaper is also a priority for me. Continuing to pursue my interests outside of the classroom is essential to my college experience.
After exploring many college options, I truly feel that being a UCF Knight is the best option for me. Since I began to consider applying to UCF, the school has only continued to convince me that it is the best place for me to reach my fullest potential as a student and as a person.
Similar to many teenagers, my start toat high school was not the best, both academically and personally.
You tell about the death of your uncle and that it depressed you. But you don't tell us why that incident had such a heavy impact on you. Why your uncle was so important to you? how did he die? He abruptly appears here and there in your essay. Then comes a new person, your friend.
I think you need to link these things together so that it unfolds an interesting story. You write well, but need to improve the organizaiton of your story.
