Better to Tell the Truth than to Lie(Prompt 1)
I sat down on my chair; turn on my computer and while waiting, I started breathing, trying to relax myself while I tried to imagine what I should create. Imagining things is easy, but making it was the difficult part. I stayed all night, trying to make a wallpaper, hoping it can amaze the judges.
Before adding the finishing touch, I waited for the next day so I can ask my art teacher for her opinion. Once I enter the room and showed her the picture which popped up on her computer screen, her face expression changed. I was a bit nervous since it was my first time showing my graphic design to her. I got to say, I was really scared to hear her opinion and I wasn't that the person that can deal with harsh words and so, I shut my eyes, ready to hear what she'll say. "Wow! Frances, it's really good! I like it!" My eyes shot open as I stare at her. She was smiling with amazement as if she just saw a new baby was born. Her words shocked me, I was clearly surprised. "Frances, I like it, especially the way you design it, but you have to put contrast on her face. Also, maybe put some words on the background to make it more pop up." Surely, I was a bit disappointed, but that didn't bring me down; actually, it helped me.
After that, I just kept working on it. I wasn't trying to make it to flashy, nor too plain, but a casual and catchy look. I ask many people for their opinion. Some say it was really well done, and some say it's not as perfect, but I couldn't blame them since everyone has different taste. Those that didn't like it, I ask for their advice on how I can make it better. Although some can be hurtful, but it's better since I rather have them telling me the truth than to lie, just so I can feel better. But who knows, maybe they did it to help me to become better at graphic. That's what I like about truths; it made me a better and stronger person. That's why I tell the truth than to lie to my friends just to make them happy. Yes, it's sad seeing them upset or furious because your comment had hurt them; hopefully, my words can make them wake up and realize what I'm doing for them is for their own good as my friends did the same with me.
My Parents and Art (Prompt 2)
Art is my passion, Art is my life. Art is who I am. I came from a middle-class family where my father is an engineer for trucks while my mother is an owner of a deli. During my sophomore year I moved to San Ramon since my parents wanted us to have better education so we can get into a better college and get well paid job. That way we don't have to suffer as they did. My parents did not get a college degree after emigrated from China since they were both poor. Now, they want us to surpass them and prove them their hard work is worth it. When my parents told us this, it made me think. Just thinking about my previous years when I was in middle school, I was one of those teenagers who would fool around and hang out with my friends. Back then, I had decent grade, but I regret during eighth grade since now I cannot get the classes I want because now I am a year behind. Even so, I still love art because it is something I can do best at.
I love challenging myself when it comes to art, hoping I can improve. Sometimes I would practice drawing on my own, hoping I can get it right. I just love the fact how an artist can draw something so beautiful to make someone happy, or have them be impressed. Other than drawing, I also like to Photoshop. I have been photoshoping since last year; at first it was confusing but it took me a week to learn how to understand the concept. After that, I have been so infatuated that it just became a hobby. I wanted to be like those graphic designer who can create all those amazing and attractive advertisements such as book/music, posters, magazine covers, etc. I sometimes would go on this website and many people would make requests for their pictures to be edited. Some of them were kind to leave nice comments while some didn't which is all right since it only made me want to try harder. I did not take any classes to learn how to photoshop since most of the time, I learn them by myself just by looking at the pictures, as I try my hardest to get it right, but I hope that I can improve and learn more each day.
I'm trying to prove to my parents that their hard work is worth it and I am graceful of what they did for us because ever since I entered my new school, I have been more focus than ever. I remember when my parents told me how lucky we are, saying they never lived in a luxury as we do; big house, good food, and parents who love them. Usually, I would ignore them because they always tell us that every time we talk about our life, but now that I think about it, it made me feel selfish and ignorant. They were my driving force that causes me to focus on art. They show me how talented I was, showing that art is who I am, yet I was not the best daughter to them since I have taken advantage of them. Now, I wish I can hear those words coming out from my parents' mouth, "Frances, you did it!" Starting by what I do best at, my talent, art.
I sat down on my chair; turn on my computer and while waiting, I started breathing, trying to relax myself while I tried to imagine what I should create.
More words than necessary.
I turned on my computer and started breathing deeply, trying to relax myself while I imagining what I should create.
Be careful about the verb tenses:
Before adding the finishing touch, I waited for the next day so I
can could ask my art teacher for her opinion.
also here
...and so, I shut my eyes, ready to hear what she would say.
... I just kept working on it. I wasn't trying to make it to flashy, nor too plain, but a casual and catchy look. I
asked many people for
Wanted us to have a better education so we
could get into ...
So the biggest problem is the past tense for verbs. Practice writing in the past tense form for each verb. Conjugating verbs is the hardest part of any language, I guess.
I love challenging myself when it comes to art, hoping I can improve. You already said this, so maybe you should say something different now.
Oh... I like a lot of the ideas you give, especially about the significance of photoshop for developing your art and also about your parents' gift to you. What is the most important message of the essay... the one you want the reader to remember?
@hpscotsgirl:
Hi and thank you for reading my essay. Well both of them are true and i didn't lie on my essay, but i see your point. But for UCs. don't they want both prompts?
@Kevin :
Hello! Thank you for helping me with my grammars and the compliments. I'm really terrible with grammar. I asked my friends to help me and so far i got it fixed, but thanks for your help!
Replying back to your question:"What is the most important message of the essay...the one you want the reader to remember?"
Well I wanted the reader know that i really passion about art and how it effected me from the past and present. I also wanted them to know my parents supported me by working hard, hoping we have a better life and so i wanted to repay them back by getting a better job that relates to art (graphic designing, fashion, or interior designing). That way, if i became successful, they might see my art work on television, on products, etc. and hopefully they can be proud of me. That's basically my dream.
