Hey Guys,
I was wondering if you could take a look at my UC essay.
Thanks !!
Describe the world you come from (family, school, community) and how it has shaped your dreams and aspirations etc...
"As in the Johnny Cash song?" is the popular reply when I tell people where I'm from. Folsom, CA isn't known for much else than its federal prison and the formerly mentioned song "Folsom Prison Blues" by popular music artist, Johnny Cash. Up until my sophomore year in high school, Folsom, CA was where I called home. The small town of 50,000 people sheltered my blissfully ignorant and conservative nature for fifteen years. Sure, I had heard of gay people, racial prejudice and world issues, but politics never seemed relevant to my life. For fifteen years my life was black and white, every question had an answer, and my world was the size of a cantaloupe. I hate cantaloupe. At the close of my freshman year in high school, I was given an opportunity to change everything. The Jewish Community High School of the Bay sits in the new western addition of San Francisco, CA. Attending this school would mean moving in with my grandparents and commuting to school via the train. So I decided to trade in my cheerleading uniform, pool parties, football games and straight A's for the unknown abyss of urban private school life. Suddenly I had teachers that were gay, others that were radical activists, and every single one inspirational. It was kind of a mind-blowing change from the child-hating teachers I was used to back home. They taught me that not only do I need to think to succeed, but I also need to question, and if I can't find answers, to push through and find them on my own. After two weeks in this new jungle, I quickly figured out I was no longer the smartest and easily the least worldly student. Catching up with my peers who had been dealing with college prep level work since pre-school wasn't my only challenge. I was not only taking core classes such as math, history, English and science, but I also was diving into the world of Judaism. Dealing with a dual curriculum proved to be harder than it sounded. Now, whenever my friends back home complain about learning Spanish,I laugh because obviously they have never tried to understand Hebrew. Junior year is over now, and I think I have immersed myself successfully into this environment just in time to leave for college. The Jewish Community High School of the Bay flipped my world upside down. In the two short years I have been here my world grown astronomically; I have flown to Washington D.C to lobby Speaker Pelosi, traveled to the south to experience the culture that brewed our civil rights movement and have opened my eyes to a world I never knew. Words can't even describe how thankful I am for JCHS. My relationships now, with my friends, teachers and even family, have more colors than the rainbow, my old universe of answerable questions now seems boring and limited, and my world no longer has a size, only potential. The seemingly simple change of schools broadened my world more than words can capture, and it made me crave intellectual growth and knowledge more than ever.
Cantaloupe has more nutritional value than many other fruits. You should try to enjoy it.
:-)
opportunity to change everything. (right here, start a new paragraph.)
Suddenly I had some teachers that were gay, others that were radical activists, and every single one inspirational.
My relationships now -- with my friends, teachers and even family -- have more colors than the rainbow; my old universe of answerable questions now seems boring and limited, and my world no longer has a size, only potential.---->That is how I would make this sentence more manageable.
