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'Book, Magazines, Challenge, Events, Summers, History' - Stanford Essays


Citygirl1120 4 / 8  
Dec 27, 2011   #1
Critiques and suggestions are greatly appreciated! What do you think?

Please respond to the following questions so we can get to know you better. Respond in two lines or less, and do not feel compelled to answer using complete sentences. 300 CHARACTERS

Name your favorite books, authors, films, and/or musical artists

Books: Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Summer Sisters, Memoirs of A Geisha, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Jodi Picoult, J.K. Rowling
Music: Beirut, Lykke Li, The Killers, Foo Fighters, Brett Dennen
Movies: True Grit, The Lion King, The Shawshank Redemption, Blues Brothers, Doctor Zhivago
289/300

What newspapers, magazines, and/or websites do you enjoy?

Magazines: National Geographic, Businessweek, Time Magazine
Websites: msnbc.com, fanfiction.net, facebook, youtube, yahoo, betises-de-style.blogspot, thehautepursuit, tumblr, reddit, theoatmeal
Newspaper: The New York Times
253/300

What is the most significant challenge that society faces today?

The most significant challenge that society faces today is unawareness. The word encompasses a multitude of entities: waste of resources, censorship, etc. The effects of this ailment hide and emerge years later to negatively affect new generations. Luckily, it can be cured with education and change.

300/300

How did you spend your last two summers?

I spent my last two summers living in Shanghai, China. There, I completed a total of three finance internships at three international companies (Applied Materials, Roche, SMIC), educated the locals about recycling, and explored the 2010 Shanghai World Expo. It was an incredible experience.

290/300

What were your favorite events (e.g., performances, exhibits, sporting events, etc.) this past year?

As an art enthusiast, I was thrilled to see the Claude Monet Exhibit at the Wadsworth Atheneum, the Sketches of the Great Artists at the Louvre, and the Alexander McQueen Exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum. I also enjoyed the satire and witty humor of the new Broadway show Ching'lish.

285/300

What historical moment or event do you wish you could have witnessed?

(I wrote two versions for this question, which one does the job better?)

Since Occupy Wall Street has emerged, I have wondered how Woodstock received as much attention as it did. I wish I could have been part of the thousands of anti-war dissidents who were clamoring for peace, because I would have experienced the largest and most compelling movement in American history.

300/300

As one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, it is expected that I wonder about the Pyramid of Giza. To have watched it being built must have been a fascinating experience, one that I wish I could have had. The enormous pyramid really shows the vast potential of the human mind and body.

292/300

What five words best describe you?

I am friendly like cupcake, ambitious as a high flying-kite, passionate like the lightning, curious as the cat, and adventurous as the satisfaction that brought it back.

170/300

ZhoeK 5 / 173  
Dec 27, 2011   #2
Historical Moment

As one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, it is expected that I wonder about the Pyramid of Giza. To have watched it being built must have been a fascinating experience, one that I wish I could have had. The enormous pyramid really shows the vast potential of the human mind and body.

I think the second one is better, but it needs a tweak.

Suggestion: As one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, it is no surprise that I wonder about the Pyramid of Giza. It must have been an absolutely fascinating experience to have witnessed its creation. The enormous pyramid exemplifies the vast potential of the human mind in collaboration with the body.

For the five word prompt, is it supposed to be five words exactly?

Favourite Event

Enjoyable and well written while portraying your vast love of art.

Last Two Summers, Books & Newspaper

Nicely done, you showed how versatile you are by giving examples for every field required.

Significant Issue

Pertinent issue. Ssuggesting a cure was also well done of you.

Hope this helps & if you don't mind would you take a look at my common app. essay. Thanks!
Walden 2 / 30  
Dec 27, 2011   #3
Wow these are really well thought out and it makes me think that i need to fix mine, honestly I do not think you can add any more because there is no right or wrong answer so as long a you are satisfied with your answers I think they are perfect. I say go with the first oneabout occupy wallstreet because you compare events from two different times showing that you did not pick an event in the past just to look impressive but to show that u have a genuine interest in it, that is what i did

Can you help me with my other parts fo the stanford app I am doing it too, specifically can you help me with the what matters to you essay.:))
OP Citygirl1120 4 / 8  
Dec 27, 2011   #4
@ZhoeK for the question where they ask you which 4 words best describe you, i don't think your answer has to be exactly five words, though it can be. I think you only have to pick 5 adjectives, and then decide what you want to do with them from there. And thank you!!

@Walden, thank you!
ZhoeK 5 / 173  
Dec 27, 2011   #5
Grace

Ohkay, the ones I have seen haven't been like that so I was wondering. I rather liked yours, nice twist.
& your welcome.
RiceAllTheWhey 3 / 16  
Dec 27, 2011   #6
I like what you said about the most significant challenge that societies face today. I very much agree that most people are unaware.

I also like how creative you were about the five words that describe you, but "curious as cat" is kind of cliche.

Off topic: I was a volunteer at the Shanghai Expo

Review my common app main essay?
OP Citygirl1120 4 / 8  
Dec 27, 2011   #7
The expo was so crowded, but it was great! And thank you for the suggestion.


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