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"born into an unstable family" - FSU admission essay


carimendez20 1 / -  
Jan 16, 2010   #1
I want to make sure its right or any improvements changes i can make to it. the topic is: For almost one hundred years, the Latin words, "Vires, Artes, Mores" have been the guiding philosophy behind Florida State University. Vires signifies strength of all kinds - moral, physical, and intellectual; Artes alludes to the beauty of intellectual pursuits as exemplified in skill, craft, or art; and Mores refers to character, custom, or tradition. Describe how one or more of the values embodied in these concepts are reflected in your life.

When I was born, I was brought into an unstable family. My father suffered of alcoholism, which often resulted in horrible situations; my mother was a hard working mother, and because she was constantly away, she made sure to establish within me certain values and morals that would guide and help me, not only while she was gone but for the rest of my life. She taught me the importance of family, of persistence, of dreams, and aspirations. That is why I feel that the ideas embodied in "vires" and "mores" are the ones that are mostly reflected in my life, since they captivate my roots, tradition, and ethics. Not only are they reflected in my life but are part of it and I consider them crucial aspects of me.

At ten years old, my life had dramatically changed. My mother had divorced; she was remarrying and we would be moving into the United States of America. This set of changes caused a lot of emotional stress, the idea of coming into an unknown place overwhelmed me. I was introduced to different cultures, and most importantly a new language, this was my first face to face with diversity. A language that at times became the source of embarrassing and frustrating moments, however, I've learned to take others criticism as incentives to improve and grow as an individual. That's how I came to challenge myself year by year, academically and personally. In school I've been enrolled in Honors and AP classes to challenge myself and to become a strong knowledgeable person, and by doing this I've discovered the potential I have and the things I am capable of doing with persistence and commitment. Through those experiences and many more I've realized that strength not only physical, but mental, emotional, and intellectual are constantly reflected in my life.

In the passed six years my family grew, two years after we arrived to the U.S.A my mother gave birth to a wonderful boy, and half a year later to a little girl. My mother stopped working to become a housewife, something that wasn't easy for her after so many years of being employed; because she had always taught me that in a family collaboration is important, I became her source of help. I made sure to babysit my siblings after school, help with whatever was necessary around the house and complete my school work. Now that my siblings are older I see that I've become a role model for them, even though they're still young they follow everything I do. That's why it's so important for me to set a good example, and show them that their big sister can achieve her dreams and that one day they will too. Due to the importance my family has in my life, i see the values in "mores" are always present in my life. I have learned from them that success comes from persistence and hard work.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 20, 2010   #2
In the past six years my...

Yes indeed. I think you answer the prompt better than most people writing this Vires, Artes, Mores essay.
niloo - / 13  
Feb 1, 2010   #3
I was born intoin an unstable family...


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