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I was born a warrior/ CALTECH's opportunities & resources

chiragjain 2 / 8  
Dec 20, 2012   #1
Scientific exploration clearly excites you (otherwise you wouldn't be applying to Caltech). What is it about Caltech's opportunities and resources that will best fuel your intellectual curiosity and develop your passion for science, technology, math or engineering?

I was born a warrior, born to fight and to compete for time` and aristeia. Competition is my religion, the world my battlefield, and its experts my holy saints. But like every religion, competition isn't free of corruption.

In life, I have fought several uphill battles, but with each battle, the desire to compete on a fair and leveled ground only strengthened. It is for this reason that I wish to study at Caltech, since I believe Caltech's honor code system would continually level the battlefield for me and enable me to pursue my interest in Science and Technology in the most passionate manner.

A competition leads to a divergence of identity and a unification of soul. A competition of teams, on the other hand, tends to bring the team members close to each others like a soul to its body, and enhances cooperation. Caltech's integrated housing system would have the same impact on me, whereby flourishing under an intensively fair and competitive atmosphere, I would strive to make friendships that would last a lifetime. Caltech's housing system would be a unique opportunity for me to expand my horizons and to learn the social customs of America.

Above all, Caltech's incredible faculty members (I have attended Professor Sean Carroll's The Teaching Company lectures on 'Dark Matter, Dark Energy: The Dark Side of the universe'), its focus on hand-on research assignments, and its ease of access of research equipments would enable me to institute my position at the frontiers of Science and Technology.

what do you think of it, guys?

ssaxena 1 / 5 1  
Dec 20, 2012   #2
very good... covers all the aspect! you may experiment a bit with sentence structure.. otherwise, it's good !

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