'Boys Nation Senator' - USAFA Application essay

Describe a setback or ethical dilemma that you have faced. How did you resolve it? How did the outcome affect you? If something similar happens in the future, how would you react?

Im not sure if this counts as an ethical dilema and im not sure how many ethical dilemmas a 17 year old encounters.

It was six in the morning at New Jersey BoyState. I was running along side one of my fellow citizens frantically searching for other party members to sign our petitions to run for boys nation senator. A candidate need one hundred signatures on their petition by 8 am to be eligible to run for Boys Nation Senator. No one citizen could sign more than two petitions and you could only sign for your political party. Max, my running mate, and I both wanted to attend Boys Nation. In fact it was the whole reason why we came to Boy State in the first place. So to help us reach our signature goal as quick as possible we urged everyone in our city to meet us in the lobby of our city and be ready to sign only our petitions. Unfortunately our fellow Statesman did not live up to their promises and only 5 of the expected 90 met us in the lobby that morning. They were too tired from the week's hectic schedule to wake up at such a demanding time. Determined to not let this set back thwart our chances at achieving our goals, Max and I went door to door, city to city asking for signatures. But our efforts were unfruitful and after we had visited every last city I had forty eight signatures and Max had fifty four. There was thirty minutes left till the dead line as Max and I lead the walk of shame back to our city to announce the bad news to our city. As we walk I pondered a discussion Max and I had earlier that morning about why we came to Boy State and our plans for the future. We discussed our speeches if we were able to run. I was never a strong public speaker when it came down to talking to large groups of people, but I believed that if I prepared and wanted it enough I could make that speech to our parties 450 strong citizens. But I also thought of the fate of our party. It had been five years since 2 Nationalist senators had been selected to attend Boys Nation. I had seen Max speak in public before. He had spoken to large amounts of people and been able to keep his charisma and charm without getting nervous. He was a confident speaker and I believed he would have a higher success rate if he ran instead of me. So he did. I turned over all my signatures to him and sacrificed my eligibility to run for Boys Nation Senator. It hit me deep to give up a goal like that but on the other hand it felt good knowing I helped someone reach their goal even if they never helped me out in the past. But my sacrifice went unrewarded. Max gave one of the worst speeches I ever heard at Boys State. His nervousness over came him and he could not bear to look at his audience without stammering over his words. He was not elected past the primaries and he did not say one more word to me after his speech was over. I had never been so disappointed. Not in Max but in myself. I had given up on one of my strongest goals to help out someone who did not deserve the opportunity. If I am ever faced with a similar dilemma I will not hesitate to grab the chance and take it. Nothing will ever get in the way of me reaching my goals again. Not even myself.

deadline is one word
I don't think you can start a sentence with so
party's 450 strong citizens
Who the heck are the Statesmen, and saying they didn't show up should probably not be included in there because it almost sounds sarcastic

It hit me deep (doesn't sound good) to give up a goal like that but on the other hand it felt good knowing I helped someone reach their goal even if they never helped me out in the past. But my sacrifice went unrewarded. Max gave one of the worst speeches I ever heard at Boys State. His nervousness over came him and he could not bear to look at his audience without stammering over his words. He was not elected past the primaries and he did not say one more word to me after his speech was over. I had never been so disappointed. Not in Max but in myself. I had given up on one of my strongest goals to help out someone who did not deserve the opportunity. If I am ever faced with a similar dilemma I will not hesitate to grab the chance and take it. Nothing will ever get in the way of me reaching my goals again. Not even myself .this part needs to be taken out. it makes you sound kind of like a pushover and does not make you look good AT ALL, especially saying your friend did badly

Also, what the heck is Boys Nation, needs an explanation

thanks for your feed back.

I dont think Boys Nation needs an explanation though. It is a very prestigious program and I am applying to the USAFA. Its one of their activities listed in the activity record.