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'Brave New World and perfect society' - Common Application Topic of your choice

Davemedsci 5 / 25  
Dec 29, 2011   #1
Hey everybody , this essay is not yet finished ( working on last paragraph and conclusion ) but let me know what you think about it , and any edit's are kindly welcomed and criticism even if it is harsh

Topic of your choice

Think back to the happiest moment of your life. Feels relaxing right? Now imagine you feel happy, safe, and secure all the time. Imagine a world where everyone is always relaxed and in no way insecure or unsatisfied. In theory, universal happiness sounds great, but in reality, the concept can require great sacrifices of basic emotions that define individualism.

In the novel, Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley, humans live in a 'perfect' society that is devoid of traditional human values. Since everyone is socially engineered for specific life roles, they are always happy and satisfied with their lives. When comparing this fictional society to our world, I began to appreciate universal human emotions such as love, curiosity, anger, and understand how our emotions define us as individuals.

Aldous Huxley effectively illustrates a planned society that exists without any worries or stress. A caste system defines each person's specific role. Through constant brainwashing, individuals are conditioned from birth to accept their social and economic status. Their society is built on promiscuity, superficiality, and pleasure-seeking. There is no such thing as love, anger, or hate; all complexity is removed along with love relationships and family. Their entire society is artificially constructed and carefully controlled. What the people consider "happiness" is just a façade; they prefer security instead of experiencing life's complexity. A planned society provides superficial pleasures, with no hardships while sacrificing real human emotions.

Although there are many life difficulties, sacrificing our individualism is too extreme of a solution for preventing undesirable circumstances. Brave New World taught me to value emotions as a guide to overcome difficulties and learn important lessons. Each person is unique in their thoughts and preferences. Our world allows for individual choice in social and career roles. The ability to choose allows for opportunity and also jealousy, greed and anger. Huxley presents a world void of choice, but also void of love and fear. These primal emotions direct our life choice and define our individuality. When all difficulties and choices are removed, with no chance to feel strong emotions, a person becomes a mere robot with no reason to think for themselves.

Please do not Rip
TheN3094 4 / 16  
Dec 30, 2011   #2
I like your essay, it is well written and you get the point across but it seems just a little too repetitive. You keep mentioning how without choices and emotions we aren't really human and its not worth it. I'm not really sure what the prompt its because I haven't looked at topic 6 yet but maybe you could elaborate a little more out of that area. Other than that you do explain the book very well. :)

PLEASE HELP ME ON MY ESSAYs. I am also using the common app but mine is a supplemental essays. I would return the favor with any other essay you want looked at. Thank youuuuuu. :)))))
OP Davemedsci 5 / 25  
Dec 30, 2011   #3
Okay thank you so much , il be check your essays shortly :)
bookbug_xd 8 / 24  
Dec 30, 2011   #4
This is a good summary of the book but I think you should try to add examples where it applies to your life. That way, you make the book more personal to you!
duckling 1 / 5  
Jan 2, 2012   #5
human values , such as worry or stress.

should be emotions
, or something of that kind.

Brave New World influenced me to value emotions as a guide to overcome difficulties and learn important lessons.

makes the topic sentence more remarkable, and throughout the second para, you better show than tell, it may seem like cliche-ridden.
the subject matter of the essay is interesting, so use better writing to make it outstanding..., like use the specifics over generalities, make better transitions, etc.

overall, the essay is pretty solid.

I asked you earlier to think about your happiest moment of your life.

something like "Now, think again about your happiest moment in life." will do better.
OP Davemedsci 5 / 25  
Jan 2, 2012   #6
Well i sent it out yesterday but thank you so much :)

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