ENGINEERING: If you are applying to the Pratt School of Engineering, please discuss why you want to study engineering and why you would like to study at Duke.
As a child, my aspirations were never very consistent. I had dreams of being president, a teacher, and now an engineer. At first glance, these choices may seem inconsistent, and random. Dig a little deeper, and you'll see that they all share the importance of problem solving. This is precisely why I would love to study the subject. Engineering offers the opportunity to make the world more structured and organized. My goal in life is to invent and create new ideas and solutions to every day problems we face. There is so much in our life that revolves around engineering in one way or another.
Engineering is all about problem solving. My background as an Army brat has taught me the importance of being flexible in order to get the results wanted. Having moved ten times in seventeen years, I've learned how to be resilient. My ability to adapt to the Army's unpredictable lifestyle has prepared me for a future in the ever evolving world of engineering.
I want to continue my education at Duke University because it would provide me the best opportunity for personal, social, and academic growth. As a woman, it would be a great opportunity to study engineering and break ground in a male dominated field. 27% of Duke's engineering students study abroad. Having this special opportunity is important to me because I believe it offers unique experiences and allows students to grow as engineers and leaders and to offer their knowledge to the rest of the world.
I have been in love with Duke since I was 8 years old when my dad, an alumni of the graduate school, took me on a tour of the campus. One of my favorite aspects is the well roundedness of the university. Duke has some of the most brilliant minds in the country, as well as great athletics and clubs. The history and tradition the school offers, along with its desire to always be one step ahead of the latest technology, paired with the "Cameron Crazies" I believe it is the perfect school for me. Duke is an ideal place for me to fulfill my potential and add my own contributions to the university. I've felt that ever since I was a little girl, Duke University is where I need to be.
Hey Nora, everything seems fine! Your writing's really good.
One thing I would suggest is, you could show an example of your problem solving skills. I mean you are so into Duke's engineering so a question might arise is, what have you done to be there! It's just my opinion think about it... it should be in the 2nd para.
Oh and you don't seem like into engineering! And neither a Army Brat :D Though you do have an extra edge as your dad's an alumni. Hope you get in!
I think your description of the campus isn't necessary/helpful. Everyone falls in love with the architecture, the school spirit, etc. If you want to include this, then say something like "No other prestigious engineering school is quite like Duke, for ____ ____ and ___ reasons."
My goal is simple -better the lives of people through engineering by studying at the Pratt School.
I think you regress a little with this sentence. You have tried to say all of these reasons why Duke is unique, but then you end with "I want to better peoples lives with engineering." you can do that anywhere. finish your essay with why exactly only Duke is the place for you. you don't want to end with "I want to be an engineer, that's why I'm applying to your engineering school"
Hi :) Your essay sounds fantastic! I can suggest some changes in your wording, but it is great even if you don't change anything :)
As a child, my aspirations were never very consistent.
You could also say it like this: "As a child, my aspirations lacked consistency."
Dig a little deeper, and you'll see that they all share the importance of problem solving.
You might want to say it like this: "Under the surface, these aspirations have the common goal of problem solving."
I think that "you'll see" is a bit informal.
This is precisely why I've narrowed my aspirations to studying engineering.
Something like this may sound better: "With an eagerness for problem solving, I have decided to focus on the field of engineering."
One of my favorite aspects is the well roundedness of the University.
Another way that you could say this: "One of the most impressive things about the University is that it is so well-rounded."
The beauty of the gardens, the majestic-like chapel, and serene walkways combined with students all decked out in blue and white spreading school spirit to everyone they meet created a picture-perfect campus.
This sentence is too long.
I would say the same: CHANGE THE LAST SENTENCE.
It isn't only Duke that has Engineering. People are also doing good things from other schools!
(Adding stuff from the Villanova essay was great)
