The common app says: "Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve"
I based my response off other essays I looked at, but need opinions. my mom was pretty harsh about it and said it was crappy soo please HELP!
My personal defining moment, what I now understand to be my "AHHA!" moment, defined my career choice. It was the moment I knew I could do nothing other than be a Broadcast Journalist, whilst on set filming my first Disney 365 newscast.
Towards the end of my freshman year my agent called. I was hired on a one-year contract as a main news anchor for Disney 365. It was very unusual for Disney to hire talent that was not a local of Los Angeles and the fact that I was in college in Tallahassee stacked the odds against that I would even be considered. My agent was giddy when she reminded me of this and I must say, I was totally surprised and just as excited. I was given the details of my first assignment and Disney had taken care of everything. They booked my flight and hotel and I was off to film my first segment. I had auditioned for Disney 365 in Los Angeles the previous summer and I had been hired to host two-minute news segments on the Disney Channel where I would interview Disney celebrities on the latest Disney attractions, shows, games and trends. I was able to help write the segment and the questions we would be asking our "guest star" and in a sense I felt like I was performing. It all came so naturally to me. After we wrapped I stood there frozen in time with the cameras in front of me, the lighting, the crew working around me and in this moment it happened, "AHHA!" This is what I was meant to do. Our producer Andy asked me how I felt and I was the most honest I have ever been in my life when I told him," Thank you so much for this opportunity because I have found what I want to do for the rest of my life." All my life experiences had prepared me for this moment. I was energized; exhilarated-it felt like a bolt of energy was running through my body. I called my parents confirming my joy to them; I knew what I wanted to do. I want to be a Broadcast Journalist.
This choice in career had always been right in front of me. Since early childhood I had been involved in the "talent" business. I booked my first print job as a Burdines/Macys model at the young age of 8 and filmed my first commercial one-year later. My acting and modeling career had always been pretty busy, but so was school. I was in the gifted program throughout elementary school and attended honors and Advanced Placement classes in middle school and high school. I had also been dancing with a dance company since the age of two and was part of the "elite," which meant I danced my little toes to various rehearsals and competitions in and out of state. I loved and continue to love my busy schedule. It is challenging yet fun and I have become very good at time management and multi tasking.
My agent wanted me to do more, but my parents wanted to be sure that I was a "normal balanced girl." They did not want to home school me, as many of my other "colleagues" were, in order to fulfill the busy life of an actress and model. It was hard to be normal when your picture is in different magazines and your face is seen on various commercials. Girls ridiculed me, made me an outcast, and I was even cyber-bullied. So naturally growing up with a limited amount of friends what was one to do? I chose to write. Writing was my escape, my friend, a haven that I found quite by accident when my fourth grade teacher asked us to keep a journal of our daily school experience. I took it further and wrote about everything- life, family, poetry, music and I read a lot too. I became and am the youngest member of the South Florida's Writers Club and fell in love with the English language, media and scripts (which were part of my everyday life). At 13 years old I was crowned Junior Orange Bowl Queen which furthered my experience in public speaking and speech writing. Then at age 16 I had the amazing opportunity of living in New York City and acting in a small musical film. I was even tutored on set and juggled schoolwork, acting, vocal lessons, dance lessons and script readings. I lived there my entire junior year of high school and came back to Miami for my senior year where I graduated with honors.
Coming to Florida State University my natural course was to pursue my studies in Creative Writing, but my freshman year was extremely difficult for me. At first all was going my way- I had just been initiated into the Delta Gamma fraternity, had settled into my dorm room and started all my classes on a very high note. At the beginning of October, right when my parents were coming to visit me in Tallahassee for the first time, we got the news. A teenage tragedy took the live of one of my best friends and it impacted me in a major way. I began to question my life and life in general and the why of this horrible accident. It was hard to focus. My first year at Florida State became a blur and my grades began to certainly reflect it. I was in a fog and could not shake it off. My writing journal just grew.
The Florida State University has been an important life experience for me. I have been an active member in Delta Gamma where I am a part of the Special Events and Alumni Crew and have participated in numerous philanthropies and fundraisers, including Dance Marathon. I also created, with the help my sorority sisters, "The Delta Gamma Drivers Group," a Facebook group for designated drivers stemming from the tragic accident that took my friends young life. I am also a part of WVFS, Florida State's student run radio station, where I broadcast entertainment news twice a week, a member of Florida States Student Alumni Association and after this semester I will officially receive my Associate in Arts Certificate from Florida State. I have been very social and have made many memories at Florida State, but it is not the right fit for my career path. My academic advisor explained that a Broadcast Journalism degree is not offered at Florida State University. I would have to take dual enrollment classes through FAMU, which of course, physically separates me from the main campus by a bus ride offered by FAMU to their campus.
The University of Miami is where I need to be. The University of Miami is one of the top five Journalism schools in the entire nation. I was impressed with the extensive courses offered and by the way the University will customize students' communication interests to "nurture the aspirations of men and women who seek to dedicate their professional lives to the art, crafts, and businesses of electronic mass media." Your tremendously talented pool of faculty, your state of the art equipment, classrooms, UMTV and extremely successful alumni are also very appealing to me. I would be thrilled to return to my roots and to a campus that I visited as a young Junior Orange Bowl Goodwill Ambassador. By attending the University of Miami, I hope to deepen my knowledge of Broadcast Journalism, continue to improve my writing and speaking skills as a journalist, participate in UMTV and eventually receive a Master's Degree in Broadcast Journalism from the University of Miami. Miami would offer me more opportunities for internships and work that will help foster my career and it is also home.
...and the fact that I was in college in Tallahassee stacked the odds against that I wouldme even being considered.
This choice of career has always been right in front of me.
I had also been dancing with a dance company since the age of two and was part of the "elite," which meant I danced my little toes ---(?)--- to various rehearsals and competitions in and out of state.
So naturally growing up with a limited amount of friends what was one to do? ---This sentence needs to be revised for clarity.
I became the youngest member of the South Florida's Writers Club and fell in love with the English language, media and scripts (which were part of my everyday life).
Coming to Florida State University, my natural course was to pursue my studies in Creative Writing, but my freshman year was extremely difficult for me.
A teenage tragedy took the life of one of my best friends, and it impacted me in a major way.
The University of Miami is one of the top five Journalism schools in the entire nation.
:)
