I would greatly appreciate opinions on these short answer essays. These are my first drafts and I am not sure if they answer the questions properly. Should I talk more about Brown in the first one? And is the description of my hometown what they are looking for in the second? Many thanks!
A. Why are you drawn to the area(s) of study you indicated in our Member Section, earlier in this application? If you are "undecided" or not sure which Brown concentrations match your interests, consider describing more generally the academic topics or modes of thought that engage you currently. 150 word limit
It was at the age of 11 when I first found out that my brother suffered from obsessive-compulsive disorder, and, at the time, my knowledge of neurological illnesses was modest. As I grew up witnessing his condition, however, I developed a keen interest in mental disorders and the human brain in general. As a person who visualizes her life as a continuous pursuit of excellence, I have set for myself the goal to achieve greatness in the overwhelmingly captivating and complex field of cognitive science, so that I might help people like my brother, and perhaps, one day, I can inspire others through my passionate contribution.
Another academic field that appeals to my interest is psychology. While being closely related to cognitive science, I believe this subject can broaden my perspective, and deepen my understanding of the people around me, and myself.
B. Tell us where you have lived - and for how long - since you were born; whether you've always lived in the same place, or perhaps in a variety of places. 100 word limit
I was born and raised in Bucharest, the capital of Romania. After 18 years of observation, I see my hometown as a fusion between two drastically different concepts. On one side, there are the limitations and mentality instilled by communism; while on the other side, there is the strive for progress, and the aspiration to achieve higher life standards. Paradoxically, both of these perceptions are simultaneously expressed through aspects such as the architectural diversity. Buildings of completely different designs stubbornly stand next to each other, combining the city's determination to evolve, with the elements that once formed 'The Little Paris'.
I have set for myself the goal to achieve greatness in the overwhelmingly captivating and complex field of cognitive science, so that I might help people like my brother, and perhaps, one day, I can inspire others through my passionate contribution. - I have set for myself the goal to achieve expertise in the (why would you want to say it's overwhelming) captivating and complex field of cognitive science, so that I may (might seems a tad unsure) help people like my brother, and perhaps (lose the comma) some (not one) day, even inspire others through my passion and dedication.
I was born and raised in Bucharest, the capital of Romania. After 18 years of observation, I see my hometown as a fusion between two drastically different concepts. On the one hand, there is the stoic mentality instilled by communism; while on the other hand there is the desire to strive for material progress, and the aspiration to achieve higher life standards. Interestingly, both of these perceptions are simultaneously expressed through aspects such as the architectural diversity. Buildings of completely different designs stubbornly stand next to each other, mirroring the city's determination to evolve, with the elements that once formed 'The Little Paris'.
hope i was helpful:)
Irina, could please critique my Lafayette essay?
