Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.
I'm still working on it, but I was hoping someone could edit it or something? I kinda suck at writing sooo here it is:
I've had many friends throughout my life, but there's one that has impacted me the most. I've known her since middle school. At the time, she couldn't speak much English, but we still managed to become friends. We both moved here at the same age, her, moving from another country, me, moving from another city. She's my best friend and has made more of an impact on me than she will ever know.
Coco's from Burundi, Africa and moved here with her parents at the age of ten, hoping to have a better life. She can speak three languages fluently: French, English and her native language. I admire her for having the strength to move to a foreign country not knowing the language there, and trying her best to learn it. She has been a great influence to me. She's made me realize that no one gets things easily without hard work, and she's an example of that. She works harder than most people my age do. I can't imagine how hard it would be, trying to adjust to a different country's language and laws.
She has told me about how there was a war in her country when she was living there and how it was dangerous just to walk home from school, how her grandparents died before she was born because of that war and how her parents struggled living in Africa. It's never been easy for her, having little or no money. Several years ago, the city donated the Habitat for Humanity house to her family. She's been through a lot and without knowing her, I wouldn't know nearly as much.
I consider her like a sister. I look at things in a different perspective because of her, and what she's been through. Thanks to her, I'm a more ambitious, thoughtful person and I'm so thankful to have met her.
She is the closest friend I've ever had and I hope we continue to be, for years to come.
She's been through a lot, and without having known her I wouldn't know nearly as much.---I made some small changes and moved a comma.
Thanks to her, I'm a more ambitious, thoughtful person, and I'm so thankful to have met her. She is the closest friend I've ever had and I hope we continue to be, for years to come. I added a comma and crossed out a sentence that was redundant.
Now ask yourself what message you want to leave with the reader. You can add another line or two, so how will you use that opportunity? I think you can finish by talking a little about the future. What aspects of your future might be different because of what you learned from your friend?
:-)
