Sup 1: what aspect of Lehigh most interests you? (150-250 words)
This year, I intend to major in Business and Economics and I know that Lehigh University College of Business and Economics offers the best entrepreneurship programs for the undergraduates. One of the most important factors contributing to the success of Lehigh is its institute- Baker Institute for Entrepreneurship, Creativity and Innovation. Beside many helpful entrepreneurship courses as well as the prestigious Eureka! Competition, the highly-acclaimed VENTURESeries, the International Undergraduate Workshops, what interests me most in Baker Institute is the unique LehighSiliconValley course. During the one-week course, participants not only have a wonderful opportunity to be in close contact with entrepreneurs, inventors, CEOs or venture capitalists but also are provided with in-depth knowledge, hands-on experiences from those practitioners. Engaging in "live cases" study with the real companies, dealing with the real situations in the real life makes very strong impression on me. This will be a chance for me to put all theories I have learnt at school into practice. In addition, having lunch or dinner with distinguished practitioners will also help me to closely interact and thoroughly understand their personal backgrounds, their character and their motivation. What I learn from them will help me in the path of becoming a CEO someday. Finally, LehighSiliconValley can make my dream come true- visiting the California's Silicon Valley, the hub of all new technology, innovations and entrepreneurships.
Word count: 224
Sup 2: If you founded your own college or university, what topic of study would you make mandatory for all students to study? What would be the values and priorities of your institution?
There is a football match in which the player just a bit hesitates then loses the ball to the opponents. They score a decisive goal and the player's team loses an entire season afterwards. Time is something that elapses in a very fast pace and cannot be taken back. Therefore, how to manage and use time efficiently is very important in everyday life. If I founded my own college, I would make "time management skill" course mandatory for all students to study. During the course, students not only learn the importance and some basic principles of time management but also participate in "live cases" which happen in their day life (I would assign a large amount of works at the same time for a week and see how efficiently they put the theories into practice). Besides, I also request every student to propose their own short term and long term plans, arrange them in order of importance with the help of our college's instructors. My first and foremost priority of this course is reality because only by dealing with the situations in real life could the students see the importance of time management. The motto of this course will be "86,400 seconds in a day is important" and I hope every student can make four years in my college the most meaningfsul and enjoyable time of their life.
Word count: 228
Feel free to comment. I really appreciate all of your feedbacks!
Hi!!
I love your first essay.It is very well written.Tells the admission officer that you are well informed about the college and the university,that you take keen interest in keeping track of what is going on...In short AMAZING!!
Now coming to your second essay:
I like the start(the concept)...the idea is not very clear though(I think so)
(There is a football match in which the player just a bit hesitates then loses the ball to the opponents. They score a decisive goal and the player's team loses an entire season afterwards)
U could say:
During a football match a player...(makes a mistake)....(loses the ball to the opponent)...they lose the match(dont include the season part.)
The body is strong....you mentioned time management....nicee
Just some grammatical errors:
- (Besides, I would also request every student to propose )
- (and long term plans and would tell them to arrange them in order ...)
You completely lost track of the tense in the end....you have started with the "past" (If I founded ) and then you just shifted to "future" .
It would be good if you make these corrections and repost your essay.
Good job anyways
