This is for the Brown Supplement. "What question could we ask to gain the most insight into you? What is your answer?" My answer is right at the 2000 character limit. Please be harsh!
Are people inherently altruistic and sincerely wish to help others, or are all of our actions explained by selfish, ulterior motives?
My answer to this question stems from the way I was brought up. My parents grew up in China during the Cultural Revolution, a period of political and social upheaval in China. Though Mao Zedong and his Communist Party made many strides for China, their advancements came at the expense of many people. Because of the shoddy politics they faced growing up, my parents were always skeptical of politicians and people in general. From a young age, they taught me to be wary of other's intentions, to always watch out for myself, to be careful in whom I give my trust, and to be down-to-earth and practical. As a result, I have grown into a careful and generally skeptical person.
So, to answer my question, I believe that people are guided by selfish motives, and that most good acts are not done for purely altruistic reasons. Whether it be for material gain or for moral gain, all actions can be traced to an ulterior motive. Some of my friends call me a pessimist and an untrustworthy skeptic, but I disagree; I consider myself a realist. I think that it is in human nature to be inherently selfish and self-preserving; these are traits we need in order to survive and adapt. Everything we do has implications of personal gain; we hold the door for others to seem polite, we donate money to buff our sense of moral superiority. These beliefs may seem sardonic, but they aren't without foundation; the very basis of capitalism is that if people act out of self-interest, competition will ensue and the individual's selfishness will all be for the common good. My realism doesn't diminish my capacity for being a kind person; I just have a sense of self-awareness for my actions. I am self-aware and skeptical, and I am not ashamed to have these characteristics. They have allowed me to mature into an independent person who is capable of dealing with hardship.
My answer to this question stems
maybe use derived or originated from the way I was brought up.
Because of the shoddy politics they faced growing up, my parents werehave always been skeptical of politicians and people in general.
careful and generally skepticaluse a word other than skeptical person.
Only thing I would say is don't use the same word more than once. Otherwise it's a good essay.
Heyyy I'm applying to Brown too.
Hmm well this is just me but frankly I'd write another essay. This one casts you in a negative light. I know you ended with being proud of who you are, and it's good to be proud of yourself. But remember, college applications are things you want to put you in the best light. Most colleges, especially the higher ranking ones, want to build a certain community - usually one where the students are actively involved in it and with each other. Writing an essay in which you pretty much say you're cynical won't really make you seem like the best candidate for this community. I know you said you're a realist, not a pessimist, but this makes you come off as a cynic anyhow. Avoid essays that make you seem like you'll seclude yourself from the rest of the community once you get into college, and this one, well, it doesn't really make you seem like one to jump into the community.
Also, this essay doesn't so much focus on you as much as it does on your opinion of other people. They want to hear about you, not what you think of others. If you really want to stick with this topic, reword it to something like "Cynic or realist? Which one are you?" That way you can focus more on you, and not what you think about everyone else. And you also don't want to insult anyone. Someone could read this and think "Oh, so you think I'm selfish? Well then..." and you don't want any butt hurt admissions officers ;D
I hope I helped some, and good luck to you!
Hi I'm also a Chinese and I could totally understand what you're talking about, I feel exactly the same way.
However, I agree with guys above me that you should maybe change a topic because this is too cynical.Although it shows who you're but it's not the way the admission
office would like. They like people who involve in community,right? b
