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Certain words cannot clearly be defined; Common app essay on wisdom


diabatem 5 / 32  
Dec 19, 2012   #1
It has a 500 word cap
Certain words cannot clearly be defined, due to their ambiguous nature. As a result, the definition for these words evolves as we become older. An example is the word wisdom. I thought to be wise meant to know all the information in the world and have the answers for every question. I believed that there were very few wise people in the world, and I would never have the opportunity to meet one.

However, on December 10, 2012, I was in for a wake-up call. I meet for the first-time Dr. Cordi, a storyteller and professor at Ohio Dominican University, and his storytelling class. He was very friendly and allowed me to watch his class. When class started, Dr. Cordi said a few things allowed his students to present their projects. The project was focused on people who were viewed as wisdom keepers. I was pretty intrigued with the subject.

The first presenter talked about her 84-years-old grandfather. She showed a short video of her grandfather telling a story. Despite her grandfather's appearance, he was very energetic and humorous. Whenever he made a joke, it was very keen and had an amazing message behind it. The second presenter talked about her great-uncle who raised her from childhood. He went through a lot in his lifetime, including face death head on. Despite that ordeal, he remained happy and loving. He told his niece many inspiring quotes and stories. After these presentations, Dr. Cordi told a story about a poor elderly man whose family was fed up with him.

The common thread between these stories was the main character's ability to captivate and inspire the audience. Each character presented a unique and admirable trait, that influence me to reflect on what wisdom truly is. Wisdom comes in many different shapes and sizes and varies from person to person. A person's wisdom should not be solely based off of someone's intellect level. Instead, it should be reflective of culmination things, which include: personality, life experiences, advice and many more. The first presenter believed her grandfather was wise because he was humble. When I heard this, I thought why be modest when you pose such a great gift. The second presenter believed her great-uncle was wise because of his life experiences. Although they might have been horrific, they altered and influenced his in a manner in which he would not change for the world. In Dr. Cordi's story, he believed the elderly man was wise. Despite the resentment and belittlement, his family presented him; he still fought to tell his truth.

I honestly believe that each presenter alongside their wisdom keeper is wise, and I am honored to have met them. They showed me a glimpse of themselves; with that I could alter and develop my definition of wisdom. Wisdom is one's ability to influence and advise others based off of experiences, conversation and views on life. To be wise, one does not have to be arrogant or wealthy; one needs to be humble and appreciative.
OP diabatem 5 / 32  
Dec 21, 2012   #2
Can someone please help me with this essay. I really need to know if my ideas flow well together, if there are grammatical errors or awkward wording. I would really appreciate your help. Thank you!
sogoldman 6 / 21 2  
Dec 23, 2012   #3
Will you be using this essay as a personal statement?

It is a lovely story, and I am happy that you enjoyed these students' stories. There were some grammatical issues, and there were some sentences that I could not comprehend.

However, the biggest problem is that you fail to reveal anything about yourself. Indeed, I do not understand your purpose at all. What is your main idea? That wisdom means different things to different people? What does this say about you? Do you consider yourself wise? Why? How do YOU define wisdom, and how has that influenced your life?

This is not a personal statement, but a summary of other peoples' stories.

Good luck! I'm sorry if I lowered your self-esteem, but you need to change most of this essay.


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