I can still remember back toT he first time I stepped foot on the UCF campus, I was 9 years old and my family and I were moving my older sister in to her new dorm room. --
unnecessary wordsdonning my
kid- sized ZTA tank top around school with pride.
I have always known that I have wanted to leave Gainesville for college and explore other communities, experiencing life on my own, without the comfort of my parents nearby.
You can shorten this sentence. The "I have always..." part is a bit boring...sorry :(
I believe UCF will help me to learn and grow as a human being.
Here you introduce a different idea. Your essay doesn't say anything about how UCF will help you grow as a human being. So why have you put this sentence?
Your essay was nice overall. However, I think you could add something about your intended course of study.