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College Comp Portfolio - An Ironic Break; earn the position as the starting goalkeeper


kmurph14 1 / -  
Dec 5, 2012   #1
Kevin Murphy
9/25/12
College Comp Portfolio
First Essay

I had worked so hard in pre-season to earn the position as the starting goalkeeper after 3 long weeks of competition in tryouts and practices. We played our home opener against Laconia and had lost 3 to 1. I played the entire game and my coach told me that I would be starting all of the games for the rest of the season.

The following day I had a fall hockey game. I was carrying the puck up the ice when I did not realize the defenseman on the opposing team had stepped up on me with a body check. His shoulder went directly into my chest. I could not breathe, I slowly skated to the bench hunched over with urgency. I had never had this feeling before, as my breath finally came back, I felt a bad cramp feeling in my lung and in my back every time I took a deep breath, or if I was bumped into by an opposing player.

I played the last five minutes of the game. It was very painful, but the game was tied so I wanted to keep playing. The game would end in a tie, and I figured I just had a bad bruise on my chest and that it would be fine the next day.

It was still decently painful to take deep breaths at school the next day and my back would have random feelings of pain. At soccer practice, the pain was almost unbearable when I had to dive on my chest or do pushups. I told my parents about the pain when I got home after. I insisted that it was probably just a bruise.

The next day was the same feelings of pain. In my mind I still thought it was just a bruise. I thought playing through the pain would not hurt my chest anymore, so I might as well not be a wimp and keep playing. I continued practice that Tuesday. The rough cramping feeling in my chest and back continued to cause discomfort. It hurt so much when I dove onto either side to block a shot. I decided I would stop diving for the day. When practice ended, I drove home and lay on my bed for the rest of the night. It was the only thing I wanted after an afternoon filled with pain.

It was 6:30 in the morning when I woke up and had to get ready for school. I moved forward and instantly felt a shot of pain directly to my chest. It was worse than any of the pain I had felt so far this week. This was the first time I thought to myself that maybe it was more than just a bruise on my rib. There was no way it was broken I thought, but what could it possibly be. I thought about this question the rest of the day at school. At practice I told coach I could not play goalie because my ribs had been in pain all week and it had only got worse. They continued to hurt every time I took a deep breath. Wednesday nights were when I also had hockey practice after soccer. I got on the ice and took a couple laps. Just a few laps around the rink were enough to make me slow down due to the pain. When it was time to sprint, I worked as hard as I could. After one sprint to the far goal line and back, I could not breathe. I panicked and slowly skated to the bench hunched over. The pain was again unbearable in my ribs and my breathing slowly came back. My dad told me to take the rest of practice off and that tomorrow we would see the doctor.

The next morning at the doctors office, I told the doctor about the pains I had been having all week. He tapped on my ribs and had me take a few deep breaths. I told him that this caused pain. The doctor told us to go to the hospital for x-rays. He said that there was a possibility of a fracture, but the likelihood was slim, due to the amount of pain a fracture can give. Usually someone with a fractured rib would see a doctor immediately because the pain is so harsh. It had been over four days of continuing my sports routines, until now, so I knew that if they were fractured, the pain would be even worse than what I had experienced.

At the hospital the x-rays were taken in a small dark room. The doctors there found that I had two fractured ribs on the left side of my rib cage. I was shocked to hear this because the entire time in my head I had been thinking that there was no way it was bad enough to be broken. The doctors were just as shocked when they heard that I had been playing sports on it the past four days and had not seen a doctor until today. I was disappointed when they told me I could not play sports for two whole weeks. I had worked so hard to become the starting goalkeeper, and now my spot would be gone. Although I sat there in sorrow in the passenger seat of the car as we drove home, I was also thankful that even though I had broken two bones, I would be right back into sports in just two weeks, where I would earn back the spot that I deserved.
672jade 1 / 2  
Dec 5, 2012   #2
That was very good! There werer only a few grammer problems but other than that good job!


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