College Supplemental Writing: 'What is your dream ?' (250 words)

A dream is a blueprint of one's potential and pursuit. My pursuit is like the website Wikipedia- always pondering over exclusive ideas and knowledge; I'm insatiably hungry. My dream is to become successful; however, I haven't marked accomplishments of humongous wealth via lucrative profession or a sound health as my life's milestones. I dream to become genius in my forte and, at the same time, venture on an ambitious mission to eradicate global illiteracy as I believe it is the pandemic cause of contemporary terrors.

I aspire to serve my nation with uttermost passion for busting the social evils that have haunted Nepalese society predominantly. I dream of creating an education portal-like Khan Academy, but more accessible- for securing the future of impoverished Nepal by educating the commanders of tomorrow. I want to establish myself as an altruistic cosmopolite concerned about every worldly affair. I dream of collaborating with the greatest minds of our age for tackling the global issues like Energy Crisis and Cyber(Cloud) Security.

As I sense myriad potentialities in harvesting renewable resources, I visualize that the future civilization will not only conquer the feat, impossible at the present, but it will also be equipped with Eco-friendly alternatives nurturing our Earth's carrying capacity. As a Computer Science enthusiast, I dream of brainstorming on variety of technical entities- Security Loopholes, Artificial Intelligence, Machine Learning- for formulation of an invulnerable Web mechanism. In this unpredictable life, I dream of utilizing every precious opportunity to make our world a better place.

@nandasharma
No need to insert website wikipedia, Just go for Wikipedia, It's famous enough for people to recognise it is a website.
Change My dream is to become successful to, my dream is to be successful in life

I haven't marked accomplishments of humongous wealth via lucrative profession or a sound health as my life's milestones.
I think you should try rephrasing that sentence into a much simpler one, for less experienced readers to understand.

I dream to become genius in my forte-looks like you are boasting about yourself, I would discourage you to use that sentence
to eradicate global illiteracy, as

Nanda, you need to think out of the box for this essay. When you are asked, "What is your dream?", you are being required to discuss your future dreams and ambitions in relation to your chosen major. Your first paragraph is too broad in scope. Even for thinking outside of the box, that is somewhat of an overkill because there is absolutely no way that you can eradicate global illiteracy. However, you can try to ease the illiteracy problem of your country. So focus your dream on solving the problem of your country. Basically, you just have to skip the first paragraph of the essay because it doesn't merge with the thoughts in the succeeding paragraphs.

Just change the opening sentence from "I aspire" to "I dream of..." in order to make it better reflect the prompt requirement. The rest of the essay from that point doesn't need to be changed. It works well as a response. If you wish to, you can use the freed up word count in order to further develop your thoughts, ideas, and sentiment in the more relevant 2 paragraphs that remain.

@Holt
From the way I see it, there's not enough space to talk more about my major (Computer Science). I'm afraid that even if I do that then I'll have to employ few technical terminologies (which the reader mightn't bother googling). So, I've shortened (not skipped entirely) the first paragraph as you said, but I still have some unused space, what do you recommend now ?

It is alright to keep the unused space exactly that, unused. You don't need to submit a full 250 words to the reviewer. That is just the maximum word count for your essay. That is not your target word count. If you review your essay and you feel that the content and message are on point with what you wish to convey to the reviewer, then the essay is all set for submission. Did you remember to change the opening sentence of your second paragraph the way that I suggested that you do? I believe that the change will help to further enhance your discussion and align the essay more with the prompt.

By the way, don't underestimate the reviewer who will be reading your essay. Most of these reviewers have a background in the major of the person whose application they are reading. Don't make the mistake of thinking that the reviewer is under capable of understanding your work. There is a reason he is a reviewer, he understands your background, and can create a proper conclusion regarding the validity of your application based upon your essay and your submitted documents. So don't be afraid to use terminologies.

If you can prove that you have the proper background to support your application through the use of those terms, then go ahead and do so. Don't just immediately assume that the reviewer is lazy, dumb, uninformed or, he won't understand what you have to say. There is a reason he is the one considering your application and you are a mere applicant hoping to get into his university.

@Holt
Here is the new version of my essay.

I am Wikipedia in flesh- always pondering over exclusive ideas and knowledge; I'm insatiably hungry. My dream is to become successful; however, I haven't marked accomplishments of humongous wealth via lucrative profession or a sound health as my life's milestones.

I dream of serving my nation with uttermost passion for busting the social evils that have haunted Nepalese society predominantly. As a Computer Science enthusiast, I dream of brainstorming on variety of technical entities- Artificial Intelligence, Security Loopholes, Machine Learning- for formulation of an invulnerable Web mechanism. I dream of creating an education portal-like Khan Academy, but more accessible to geographically remote locations- for securing the future of impoverished Nepal by educating the commanders of tomorrow. I dream of utilizing my technical knowledge to trigger Nepalese Industrial Revolution- the only hope of progress for agro-based Nepalese commercial market- through employment of futuristic A.I. technology with flawless monitoring and database management system. I dream about working on strengthening of cyber security and forensics with a mission of safeguarding the cyber-world from terrorists.

As I sense myriad potentialities in harvesting renewable resources, I visualize that the future civilization will not only conquer the feat, currently impossible, but it will also be equipped with eco-friendly alternatives nurturing our Earth's carrying capacity. I also have a dream to launch an environment friendly tech firm determined to promote infrastructural integrity. Ultimately, I dream of establishing myself as an altruistic cosmopolite collaborating with the greatest minds of our age for tackling the universal issues of mankind.