Why Columbia; I am extremely enthralled by what Columbia's curriculum has to offer

Why Columbia Essay- Columbia Supplement

This is my why Columbia essay. Please review for me.

"If you could go to any university in the world, which would it be?"

"Columbia"

"Why?"

*Why?*

A few years ago, I had this conversation with my mother; then I didn't have an answer. But, if I could relive that exact conversation, my answer would've been something like this.

I could major in Computer Science at any University. Many other universities boast of facilities, faculty, and class sizes like that of Columbia. Many offer me amazing internships, exciting extracurricular and comfortable accommodations. But what makes Columbia much more attractive to me than any other university is its advancement for women in Computer Science. As an aspiring major in a field mainly dominated by the male community, it is very easy to feel outnumbered. However, I am greatly impressed by a university that encourages females to break the cultural stereotype.

In addition, when I visited their website, the emphasis on integrative studies found in the Core Curriculum stood out to me. Having the ability to offer Computer Science as well as be able to learn about Music Humanities or Contemporary Civilization, courses which stray completely from my Computer Science major excites me to the core. Humanities help us understand one another through their culture, music, arts. The humanities also encourage us to think creatively. They teach us to reason about being human and to ask questions about our world. Hence, I find it greatly remarkable that Columbia understands that Humanities are extremely important and necessary regardless of their major or concentration. Liberal arts are a very important and beneficial field and I believe there is no better place to study it than at Columbia.

I am extremely enthralled by what Columbia's curriculum has to offer and although rigorous, I know what I gain will be worth it in the end.

Jamila, don't waste your word count on repeating the prompt. Don't waste your presentation space on a fictional discussion with your mother. Just respond directly to the question and develop your responses with direct references to specific areas of Columbia that impressed you the most. For example, when you say that the university promotes the development of women, mention which specific programs for women either in your course, extracurricular activities, or other references stood out the most for you any why. The "why" should be based on your academic goals or academic beliefs regarding education and academic opportunities for women.

Never refer to the website in your essays. Merely indicate that you learned the information. The how is not as important as the "why" these information impressed you. Try to relate Humanities to courses offered that excite you, but try to make it come full circle with an application to your computer science major. That way the university reviewer will see that you have a clear understanding of how you will receive a well rounded and inter-connected education at Columbia.

This is essay is quite in rush. To clarify my point, You talked about women society and then about CS. But the problem is the first part of the essay requires more care than the other part because, in my humble opinion, it is more attractive. So you can add more information in the first part.

Little grammatical mistakes:
But if I could relive not but, if I could relive
very important and beneficial field, and I believe...