please I need help to correct the structure and grammar.
Greatest architects started by building chairs, beds, lamps, tables, sofas. Later, they combined the ability to design furniture and build structures. The result is a complete coherent and perfectly proportioned masterwork that fits in a setting. Me as cabinet maker, I see myself in the future expressing these ideas through the art of architecture. The undergraduate program of Architectural Science is the type of education that will provide me an excellent foundation in my career path. I am clear that I want pursue the program in the area of architecture because it will enable me to combine my education background, work experience, and motivation to archive my goals.
I started my education in 2006 at De-Vry University in Florida USA. In 2007 I withdraw from school and move to Toronto. Later In 2008, I enrolled at Seneca College and took an Academic Up-grading Program. This program helped me improve my learning skills. Also, I received academic awards for great effort and outstanding marks in grade 12 English and mathematics. In addition to studies, I decided to learn to draw blueprints. And, I took AUTO-CAD 2D at George Brown College. My experiences as a cabinet maker helped me thought the program and encourage me to study architecture.
After I graduated from high school, my very first job was in cabinet making. I learn the construction techniques and finishing techniques. But, most of the experience I gain it was in Canada. Coming to Canada and working for one of the best companies in Toronto was a great advantage for me. I learn valuable things such as design skill, craftsmen skills, attention to detail, composition of color, and a strong vision. The position as cabinet installer gave me the opportunity to get more involve with trade workers, contractors, designers, and architects. Moreover, I familiarized with the whole process of renovation and building new structures. This job changed my life because I met new people and discovered a passion for architecture.
In this important Phase of my life, I'm sure Ryerson University will be the perfect education for me. I expect the program of architectural science along with my experience will help give me the tools to work with a diverse group of people in the field of architecture. It is the passion and personal interest that keeps me motivate. And I hope that one day will represent Ryerson University on the world of architecture.
I think you need to write less about your education, which they will already know about looking at your application. You should write more about why you think architecture is important for the world and why you like it, not why you are qualified for it. Also, why is Ryerson University's architecture program more special than any other college's architecture program?
