I come from a different background than yours; Stanford Roommate

Hey Guys,

Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.

Here is what i wrote !!

As you might have noticed I come from a different background than yours, even a different country, so bear in mind I won't quite understand the slang at first but I will get used to it. I will tell you more about myself. Personally I prefer studying at night. Sometimes I am an early riser sometimes I am not; it all depends on the mood. Don't worry i don't study with loud music. I am a very positive person I can easily turn bad experiences to positive ones. I am very flexible if you want to set a schedule for studying. I am very fun to be with and I was told that I am a good listener. I hope you like jazz music because I am big fan. I practically listen to all sorts of music except for metal.

I am not a very tidy person but I try as much as I can. I know how to do all the house shores and i can teach you. I have lots of Hobbies like photography, stand-up comedy and writing.

I am not a vegetarian but I don't like eating lots of meat too. I am not allergic to any type of food. I am a big soccer fan. I like and play several sports like squash, soccer, volley and basketball. I am not the kind of person who sits all day in the room studying. I Take several brakes and Go out with friends but when I am studying I have 100% focus on what I am doing.

Hope I see you soon.

You come off as quite sincere in getting your roommate to know you as a person but remember that the selection committee has to go through thousands of these essays and you never want to be forgettable; perhaps you should start off with a shocker statement or something of that virtue..

Please read my essays, any help is greatly needed and appreciated !

Your essay needs some variety; parallel some sentence and vary your words; don't just use I am.... or I..., use some addition like although...., my hobby is.... or something like that.