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I come from a world of fantasy - The World that inspired me is the Anime World.


achen0688 1 / 3 1  
Nov 21, 2014   #1
Prompt: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations. 250-500 words.

For UC application


I come from a world of fantasy, a world where supernatural phenomenons are rampant. Yet I also come from a world of reality, a world where lessons of life are beautifully painted into a brief 20 minutes. I come from a world of conflict, a world where courage and resolution are put to the test. I also come from a world of peace, a world where friendship and love brings us together. I come from a world of the future, a place where science booms and robots and flying cars are common sights. I also come from the past, a world where history leaves it's unremovable marks on mankind. I come from a limitless world, the world of anime, a place where one's imaginations surge wildly.

As I watch my favorite shows, my mind immerses itself into the world, and all the stresses of daily life fade away. This fantasy world isn't a place for me to escape reality, in fact it teaches me the truths of reality. By tightly intertwining them closely together, audiences not only enjoy stunning artworks and captivating storylines, but also moral lessons of friendship, passion, and self-expression. In this world, anything I desire can become reality, from experiencing youthful love to becoming a pilot of the robot I've always dreamed about. In this world, I learn that I can be whatever I want to be. I realize that as long as my passion exists, as long as I have my motivation, anything can become reality. It is the fact that the world of anime is so wide, so limitless, that I am able to let myself run free.

When I was 7 years old I was instantly intrigued by the protagonist of "Astro Boy". Watching him fighting the bad guys with an arsenal of weaponry, and becoming the symbol of friendship and justice of Metro City, I was captivated. That became the budding of my love for robots. Science fiction suddenly became my favorite genre, from books I read to shows I watch. The ideas that are depicted in the stories stem from the deepest wishes of the writer's mind. When I see them in motion, I can't help but think of the possibilities that lie beyond. Later on, I was also introduced to the popular "Gundam" franchise. Like with Astro Boy, I became interested by the show's depictions of giant, humanoid robots, piloted by people sitting inside them. As the pilots battle to protect their families, home country, and values, their strong burning passions remind me of why I developed a love for robot. I think to myself, "When I grow up, I will definitely create a giant robot like that Gundam!" I still remember when Honda released its models of the Asimo line humanoid robots. I couldn't contain my excitement as I replayed the demonstration video over and over, while in my head ran the thought, "Maybe it could become a reality!" Although I did not realize at the time, engineer became my career goal since the age of 10.

I am often mocked, even criticized by peers for being so passionate about my anime world. However, I am not disheartened. My passion has not dwindled. Every time I return to this world, I am constantly reminded that as long as my dreams and enthusiasms exist, I will be able to achieve them.
melramadhani 16 / 46 6  
Nov 22, 2014   #2
Hi,

I'm not an expert in this, but I think your essay is beautiful.
However, what the prompt is asking is not something that insipres you, but your community / place / situation you come from. Your fondness of anime might not be the answer that is expected by the prompt. If you have anime community, you can tell about that, modifying some part of this essay.

I hope I helped!
OP achen0688 1 / 3 1  
Nov 22, 2014   #3
Thanks for the input, but since it said a "world you came from", with family and school only being an example, I thought the leniency allowed me to answer it with a creative approach. But if it appears that the topic has to be a realistic, concrete one, then I guess I might have to redo it...
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Nov 22, 2014   #4
Andrew, while you present a very vivid and inclusive description of the two worlds that you come to, I am afraid that your essay did not manage to go beyond that. You were not really able to explain how belonging to these two worlds helped to shape your dreams and visions because you did not present any dreams or visions in your essay.All you presented was an idea of how your dreams and hopes would continue for as long as your excitement for these two worlds exist. We need to see something more solid in this essay. Something along the lines of the two worlds merging and developing your interest in a specific field of study, hobby, or view about life. That is the message that the essay is asking you to deliver as you discuss the world that you came from. It is in understanding this world where you developed into the person that you are today that we will truly understand how you arrived at this point in your life. Try to revise the essay to be a reflection of that need in the essay.
OP achen0688 1 / 3 1  
Nov 23, 2014   #5
Thanks Louisa! I revised my essay and added in more details describing my developing interest in engineering and robotics. ^^

I also extended my essay by a lot, since I realized I could go beyond 500 words.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Nov 23, 2014   #6
This is definitely one of the best versions of this essay. I found some places where you can revise the content though. I believe these are the additional sentences that you put into the essay.

That became the budding of my love for robots

- That became the catalyst, the foundation, for my love of robots and robotics.

I became interestedby the show's depictions of giant, humanoid robots,

- ... interested in the show's...

a love for robot.

- ... love for robotics .

Ithink to myself,

- Ithought to myself

while in my head ran the though

-While I thought...

Although I did not realize at the time, engineer became my career goal since the age of 10 .

- While I did not realize it at the tender age of 10, I had developed a career goal -- to become an engineer.

Check out how the changes I suggested work for you. It seems to make the paragraphs sound better in my opinion :-)
OP achen0688 1 / 3 1  
Nov 24, 2014   #7
Thank you so much! These changes help a lot in making my essay sound better stylistically :)


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