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Common App(Issue of Concern) + Syracuse Supp; "Luxury of automobiles"


dmullen1994 1 / 1  
Dec 22, 2012   #1
Im getting all my college essays done over Christmas break so i just wanted to get more eyes on them to have them be the best they can. Also i am aware of the lower case i's.

Common App - Issue of Concern

Call me crazy, but my greatest goal in life is to never own a car. Yep, that's it. The luxury of automobiles has plagued modern society since its inception in the late 1800's. Not only have automobiles allowed us to acquire debt, and kill ourselves or others, they have also set in motion the destruction of planet earth and the poisoning of the very air we breath.

My blended family owns three cars, two of which require monthly payments in excess of 600 dollars. We take two cars everywhere we go. It disgusts me. Not only do we travel on more wheels than we need to, 4 of those wheels are also powered by an environmentally indifferent, 8 cylinder engine that garners a whopping 14 miles to the gallon, that is, if you drive in a straight line, and don't stop at all. One year, 20,000 miles and 5000 dollars in gas money later, that truck has released two elephants worth of CO2 into the earth's atmosphere. Multiply that by two million, the approximate number of cars being driven in the United States alone, and there are now four million carbon elephants floating in the sky, after just one year. Factor in the rest of the world's automobiles and you could probably open a zoo.

Newton's Second Law tell us that net force is equal to mass multiplied by acceleration. Given that a car weighs about 18 times more than the average man, and accelerates infinitely faster than any human being, the potential harm a human can cause is made hundreds of times greater, just by hopping into a car. My "father," seven years absent on his quest for drugs and alcohol, owns no cars but has managed, at times, to get his hands on one. Unbeknownst to those around him, my father had gone from being a mildly dangerous two hundred pound man, to a lethal four thousand pound man of steel. One blunt, one bottle, one broken neck and one four car pile up later, everyone on route 29 could see the devastation that a man and a pickup truck could cause. If only Newton could have told us that this kinetic phenomena would results in the death of more than forty human beings by the hands of drunk drivers, every single day.

Keeping the goal of not owning a car in mind, I plan to start riding my bike more in the near future. Aside from the fact that riding a bike only produces as much carbon dioxide as you breath out while riding, with a bike I have the added benefits of getting exercise and getting to observe the (neglected) world around me without pushing it closer to the brink of destruction. Plus, on a bike the only fuel I need is water. Not only that, but I am also a lot less fearful of what harm a drunk biker can cause me as opposed to a driver. However, everyone knows you can't get to all the places you need to be with just a bike. That being said, my other goals include finding out what public transportation options I have in my town and breaking my habit of relying on GPS to get everywhere I need to go.

Syracuse Supplement - (Im not done question 4 yet)

1. What influenced you to choose syracuse.
2. Person who you aspire to be.
3. What you have learned from work experience.

1. Before i visited its campus i had never even heard of Syracuse University. With this in mind i can say without a doubt my visit was what influenced me to apply to Syracuse. Even though i had seen some pictures and perused websites to get some general information about the school before my visit, i don't feel as though any computer screen or piece of paper can do a school justice. During my visit with the Princeton University Preparatory Program i felt at home on the campus and knew within a few minutes that i could definitely see myself going to school there. Its a hard feeling to describe, but when you visit a large number of colleges and universities certain ones evoke a sensation of, "i kinda like it here." Syracuse's solid academic reputation and wide range of opportunities on campus and around the world further enticed me. Not only that, but i was also pleased to know that Syracuse has high caliber sports teams which i would love to watch and support. Last but not least, i quickly came to realize that Syracuse has the best food by far of any school i have visited when i ate dinner on campus!

2. To be completely honest, I do not aspire to be anyone other than myself in my lifetime. However that doesn't mean there are not some people i aspire to be like in terms of achievement and success. One figure in particular who i aspire to like like is Andrew Carnegie. Although a few years ago i only knew of Andrew Carnegie for his incredible wealth, i now understand that he was much more than just one of the richest men the world has ever seen. Carnegie was at the head of the steel revolution during the 19th century, an event that would change the face of the planet and reinvent human society itself. Yet even after this great achievement he sold his life's work and dedicated himself to becoming the most recognized and influential philanthropist in the history of mankind. Using the fortune he spent and entire lifetime to attain Carnegie built libraries, halls and other building in order to support education and promote the advancement of human. Ironically enough, one of these libraries is actually part of Syracuse University! All of Carnegie's efforts to help the people around him have established him as the model for aspiring philanthropists.

Although i do not particularly want to bear the burden of being a multimillionaire, i have an immense amount of respect and admiration for Andrew Carnagie because of his selfless nature and his influential life. Like Carnegie, i want to leave this life with the feeling that i have spent my time wisely. I don't necessarily care if i am remembered by the world as i understand there there is just as much honor in being an invisible hero as there is in being a super one. If i believe that i consistently have a meaningful impact on the lives of those around me by the time i die then i will be happy, rich or poor, famous or forgotten. This desire is a major part of the reason i currently aspire to be a neurosurgeon, a profession where i would be able to other's lives into my own hands every day. With these goals in mind i believe that syracuse would not only be able to provide me with the physical resources to pursue my interests in the brain and technology, but also the environment in which innovative ideas will be supported and made into reality. I am confident that Syracuse shares my desire to advance the human race and all of its interests.

3. Although i have only been working for a couple of months i have actually learned quite a bit. The first major thing i have learned from my job as a cashier is that i absolutely have to go to college. Although i enjoy getting a paycheck at the end of the week, the work i do is monotonous and does not exercise my mind in any way. It has also become clear to me how much of a struggle life must be for those people who have to work as a cashier to support their families. During a conversation with my manager she revealed to me that she works two jobs from nine to four and then five until 10 nearly every day. That amount of work is absolutely unacceptable for a retirement age woman to be doing every day, just to pay her bills. With a college education i believe that i will be able to more easily secure a full time job that i actually enjoy, and maybe even lend a hand to people like my manager who can barely hold their own.

I have also learned a lesson in attitude adjustment. Not that i am a disrespectful person, but i am willing to admit that i am defensive and can sometimes be a little too forward in the face of unfair or poor treatment, a quality i attribute to my mothers side of the family. On occasion this quality results in me exacerbating conflicts when there are easier ways to solve them. Of course in a work environment i have to constantly have a level head, even when i am dealing with people who doing the same. My job is great practice for me to keep my cool even when full grown adults lose theirs, and has allowed me to understand that it is easier to kill people with kindness than it is to give then the argument that they are looking for.
kabal 9 / 61  
Dec 22, 2012   #2
You way you answered the first 3 question looks like you know what you want and you are determined. your first essay is very interesting. Car's damage to the atmosphere is not as much as the factories in china. Also you make it sound scary. At least write some good points about cars a person might think.g the admission officer . and give a counter argument.

You could also say that cars limit human interaction and connection and take it from there.
just one person's opinion.


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