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Common App- 150 words- Student Council


mle2010 7 / 38  
Nov 16, 2009   #1
Common App- In less than 150 elaborate on one activity you are proud of.

For my senior year, I decided to run for a position on the Knesset (Student Government). My school doesn't have the normal president, vice-president, etc. We have a president, four executives that represent different aspects and two representatives from each grade. I ran for Student Activities Executive and won, meaning I am responsible for planning dances, mixers, and any other social activity or event. Even though we are not even half way through the year, I love my job. At some points its stressful, getting calls from my advisor at midnight asking for advice, and planning last minute details while studying for AP Biology, but its one of the most rewarding jobs I have ever had. To see that you have successfully represented your peers and were able to plan an event that they enjoyed makes the stressful times worth it.

Thanks Guys!
Liebe 1 / 542 2  
Nov 16, 2009   #2
Is joining the Student Council, an activity?
Also,

In less than 150 elaborate on one activity you are proud of.

^Why are you proud of this ''activity''?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 18, 2009   #3
We have a president and four executives that represent various interests and two representatives from each grade.

I ran for Student Activities Executive and won, which means I am responsible for planning dances, mixers, and any other social activity or event.

Even though we are not even half way through the year, I already love my job.

At some points its stressful, getting calls from my advisor at midnight asking for advice-----> sounds funny that your adviser calls you to ask for advice...

When you write "you" it is almost offensive to the reader... as if you are presuming to understand the reader... isn't that strange? Strange but true, don't write "you." It is better like this: To see that I have successfully represented my peers and was able to plan an event that they enjoyed makes the stressful times worth it.
medelman2010 11 / 31  
Nov 18, 2009   #4
Hey, considering we are on the same student council i think i may be of assistance lol

One grammatical note: try not to talk directly to the reader as in "To see that you...", keep it personal. The AO wont want to be preached to. they want to know why this is a meaningful activity for YOU.

Also, maybe talk more about how you are proud of it instead of about what you do: you can talk about how its taught you to collaborate in a group ) (both within knesset and to the admin to make things happen, its taught you about time management and event planning. you are proud that you took the initiative to step outside of your comfort zone to run for this position, and are proud of all that it has taught you.

I think if you make it more personal it will be much more powerful and will let the reader know more about you.

keep up the good work!


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