This is what I have so far, what do you thing of it and how can i make it better?
Splint your partner across from you, then form an elbow mold for the student to your right, and finally cast the forearm of the colleague sitting diagonally from you. Splinting, molding, and casting, along with an explanation about Orthopedics and reading X-Rays all studied and observed in just one of the many eventful days at Mini-Medical School. A series of lessons intrigued and invigorated every students desire to further pursue the medical field. Knowing, the incomprehensibility of teaching years of biology, chemistry, histology and the rest, just being exposed to and shown what there was still to learn, left me fascinated and intrigued. My ever present interest in Medicine was only questioned by my lack of knowledge, "What could I really be doing in the future?" It felt as though I had finally answered that question.
Good afternoon.
My first concern is capitalization; make sure that you are capitalizing proper nouns and words at the beginnings of sentences only. If it is not either, the word should not be capitalized.
Also, make sure you are properly using the apostrophe, especially as it pertains to possession. For instance, "...every students desire to..." should be "...every student's desire to...".
A refresher on when to use commas could help as well, as there are some instances here of inappropriate use of commas. There are many online refresher guides that can help you with this.
As to content, you've got a pretty good foundation. More details will definitely
make this piece more interesting.
Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
