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CommonApp Essay PS - the effect of Chess on my life


frizter 1 / 1  
Oct 13, 2022   #1
Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it.

If this sounds like you, then please share your story.



As I glanced across the battlefield, my opponent's regiment stood weak. His general was unprotected, and his knights were surrounded. With no clear conquest in sight, salvation seemed like his only choice. Yet he looked relaxed, controlled. Was I missing something? Perhaps a fatal flaw in my perfect defense? I looked down at my army, and as my composed soldiers stared at me with a look of belief, I felt at peace. "We are all in this together!" I announced, more confident than ever. I ordered my warriors to fall into place and declared, "Check."

My foe's face lit up with joy. I had missed something, something big. Surveying the front, I searched and searched for my mistake. But I could not find it. I felt useless. I rested my head in my hands, closed my eyes, and regretted everything. Why had I shown up for this competition if I was not capable of winning? Why did I not think harder about each move? Just as I thought everything was going well, I had failed. As the clock ticked, I waited painfully for the sound of my downfall. A few minutes later, it came.

I raised my head slowly. This is it. This is where I lose. Staring at the board, I still didn't see my mistake. My opponent had made a simple move, one I had originally expected. Am I still missing something? I looked at my rival curiously, and what I saw shocked me. He seemed angry, hopeless. And then it hit me. I never made a mistake; my opponent only thought I had made one. Adrenaline rushed through my veins as my heart pounded in delight. I was winning. Confidently, I commanded my soldiers to move into position and pushed the clock. I was going to win.

Growing up, I was never confident in myself. I always felt like I was not capable of achieving. I would put on a persona for those around me that I believed in myself, but I didn't. Finding chess changed that for me. It gave me a platform to prove to myself that I am capable of anything, and I did that by winning competitions and competing nationally. Chess changed my life and ever since I came across the game, my belief in myself has never stopped growing. Since then, I have found programming - which showed me a world in which I was in control, where I could create anything I wanted. I would spend any time I could find in this ether, starting projects and learning languages. I even started a business with some friends in the space and turned over 6 figures in the 2 years we ran it. My confidence has never been higher, and the experiences I have had because of chess have been amazing.

When I think of my younger self, I see a lost individual with no faith in himself. I see a boy who fears taking a step forward in case there is no going back. I see a child who has no idea what he is capable of. All it took was a push, a confidence boost. It can come in all forms; such as a hobby or interacting with others, or it can even come in the shape of a small 1500-year-old board game.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4773  
Oct 14, 2022   #2
The topic the writer has chosen to open up about in this essay does not really make him stand out within the prompt expectations. While the game of Chess is admittedly a game of skill, there is a lack of true relevance in this story as it does not indicate what happened during the game. Did this experience reveal a chess prodigy? Did the player win a national championship? Is this a skill that could be helpful to a varsity team of the university? No. Therefore, this is not a unique background, identity, interest, or talent that the reviewer would take note of. Everybody can play chess. Not everybody can be a champion chess player, but from the sounds of it, the writer was not even relating a chess competition scenario, just an ordinary chess game taken to great heights by his overactive imagination. While he did mention joining and winning competitions, the fact that he failed to mention the names of the competitions, participation dates, and winning positions would make this claim suspect in the eyes of the reviewer. Reviewers like reading about claims that can be verified. Yes, reviewers fact check claims made in the essays.

He can still use this essay though with necessary adjustments, just not for this prompt. He may want to consider using it for the open topic prompt instead. That way he can set the parameters for the writing and reading considerations as necessary for the reviewer to note.
OP frizter 1 / 1  
Oct 14, 2022   #3
@Holt

So if I was to set it to the open prompt, you think it should be good?


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