Hey guys! Please take a look at my essay and give me any advice and critique. This is my first draft of essay, so it may contain many errors.
Extended Essay
Essay Option 4: While working at the Raytheon Company, Percy Spencer noticed that standing in front of a magnetron (used to generate microwave radio signals) caused a chocolate bar in his pocket to melt. He then placed a bowl of corn in front of the device, and soon it was popping all over the room. A couple of years later, Raytheon was selling the first commercial microwave oven.
Write about a time you found something you weren't looking for.
Five minutes before the class finishes, and a week before the midterm starts, my economics teacher announced that the international trade will definitely be the main topic on the following exam. I could see my friends shrunk with desperation, as that was the part they found most difficult. We went to the library right away for self-teaching. The sky was crystal clear, and the still breeze tickled my cheek. It was perfect time for me and my classmates to elaborate on the preparation of midterm. As a group leader, I was instructed by the teacher to give other students description about comparative advantage, a concept with which many of them were riddled.
During the group study session, I gave other peers fundamental explanation about the term. Being in the position of teaching someone was something that I enjoyed most. However, because of my imperfect knowledge, I was unable to satiate the infinite academic hunger of my fellow students. The assumption that the countries always has a constant opportunity cost of producing one good to the other, which was contradictory to production possibility curve graph that shows increasing cost as the amount of goods or services produced augments. I recollected my father's statement that if one cannot teach something fully to others, it means that he has limited information or not completely grasps the concept. Tormenting on the idea that my understanding may have been flawed, after returning home, I delved into the entire scope related with comparative advantage. I was resolved to clarify the vague area I wasn't actually well known of, and discover something new that would broaden my view on the subject.
Initially, I could not understand which part had I missed. I pondered over the word repeatedly to get the clear picture of it. However, all the painful efforts seemed to be futile. The deeper I got into the question, the more I perceived myself fallen into an inescapable quandary. A mournful sense of desperation possessed me, and I put my pencil down. After a short moment of rest, to cool my confused head down exhausted with economics, I started my math homework. Solving a question about differentiation, a curved graph, which has variable gradient according to different values, caught my eyes. I instinctively related the graph to the comparative advantage model.
Eureka!
The intricate question that tormented me got resolved swiftly, unexpectedly. I extricated myself from the confusion why production possibility frontier of a country trading with its partner is a straight line instead of a curved one. I understood that the cost have to be equal to the change in level of production, so that the trade can be made. With the fixed opportunity cost, countries can evaluate reasonable terms of trade to be benefited from trading. As a by-product of the fortuitous discovery, I also spotted another reason that the opportunity cost ought to remain constant. Changing cost cannot adequately explain the basic presumption that trade cannot be made when two countries have same opportunity cost, because in such case, none of the both countries can be better-off from transactions.
I carried my steps pleasantly to school, imagining that I could be a savior of the entire class. This amazing knowledge (at least it was for me) was purely of casual encounter. However, it was what fueled even more of my intimate interest in economics. An ineffable exultation was something that greeted me every time I made a new leap or progress. It was sweeter than my favorite lemon tea, and more inspiring than incessant encouragement teacher would grant to me.
when you say, "It was perfect time for me and my classmates to elaborate on the preparation..." I would say "It was a perfect time for my classmates and I to elaborate on the preparation..." or "It was the perfect time for my classmates and I to elaborate..."
overall your essay is great! could you please help me with mine?
