Revised: Please edit
What are the unique qualities of Northwestern - and of the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying - that make you want to attend the University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?
I remember when I was 8 years old, my mother always used to drive to Evanston every weekend to eat at Clarke's. On the way there, we would always pass a building and just before it stood a black sign with golden letters that read, "Northwestern University". I would have never guessed that ten years later Northwestern University would mean something to me.
The Lincoln Park High School Marching Band was invited to perform in Northwestern University's Homecoming Parade the first time I set foot on campus. Before the parade, we got the chance to watch the Wildcat Marching Band perform their field show. The band was full of life as they marched and showed us their paws, they growled with Wildcat pride. They were excited to perform what they had put so much hard work into for us. Then they started to play. It was a fresh, crisp sound that surrounded the area in which we were standing. It was exhilarating to hear music so articulate. One of the many great things about NU is the many programs open to its students. The music programs that are available to non-music majors is an aspect that is important to me. I have been a trombonist for five years and I have worked very hard at it. I am in the top marching and concert band as well as the advanced orchestra at my high school and I want to continue working on music, learning new instruments and just for the learning experience.
Not only was the music great but so was NU's atmosphere. Everyone experiences a vibe that will tell you about a place. You know when home feels like home and when it doesn't. NU's atmosphere gives you that feeling. The feeling that you are home. All of the students were engaged in conversation, laughing and socializing, different races interacting with each other like a big family. The coming together of the students at the Homecoming Parade also showed me NU's diversity of students. I have been speaking French for 8 years now and I have lived in Paris, France, yet I still want to travel more and meet more people and learn more languages. Being a student who has lived in the U.S. for 17 years, I don't always get the opportunity to meet people from other unique countries. NU provides that diversity and richness of culture that I've always wanted to explore. Even within its opportunity to study abroad.
While pursuing an education, I want to major in Computer Science and combine it with the arts or work with robots, and minor in French. I love the open mindedness of the computer science field, there are a ton of jobs that you could do. NU's Robert R. McCormick School of Engineering and Applied Sciences really allow their students to combine creativity with computers and to invent all kinds of different programs and devices that could change our world. The students are challenged to use their minds to create something that could make a difference in people's lives, animal's lives, and society. Having that freedom to expand my education and ideas is what also drew my attention to NU. I want to be creative; I want to invent and change the world, even outside of the U.S. I have a thirst for knowledge that can never be quenched and I want to thrive in a University that will challenge me, that will let me explore and excel in everything I want to do, and that has a wide variety of cultures that I could learn from. NU is that University.
I think your essay is very clear and well stated. Overall you did a really good job :) Here are a few grammar suggestions.
On the way there, we would always pass a building and just in front of it stood a black sign with golden letters that read, "Northwestern University".
The coming together of the students at the Homecoming Parade also showed me how diverse NU was
Having the freedom to expand my education and ideas is what also drew my attention to NU. I want to be creative; ...
NU is that University.... I would probably write out Northwestern University for this sentence
If you get the chance, it would be great help if you could read my common app short essay... I'm really struggling on making it sound right.. =/
