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"I am a consistent person, newspaper club"


SeanNa 1 / 3  
Nov 25, 2010   #1
My mother always says to me that I am a consistent person. Yes, my mother is correct. Actually, I have never stopped any goals until I got them done. Until I was in middle school, I was not sure that which career I should seek for. Then one day, I read one article which said, 'Three major news paper companies in Korea are reporting news in favor of some corrupted politicians.' This article not only made me so irritated, but also set my goal of life; be a world influent Journalist, and fix all the corruptions in media.

This goal led me to come to America. When I first came to America, I had no idea what could I do for my goal. So, I just decided to take as many journalism related courses as I could. Thus, I took 3 English classes, and sociology class, and did not take any science and math class because I thought science and math would not be important for my goal. As a non-English person who came to America for the first time, it was a heavy load to take 3 English classes and sociology class at one year. However, my strong passion for my goal kept encouraging me to go forward, ending up having B for my all 3 English classes and B+ for my sociology class.

After I finished my first year in America, I came to Lehigh Valley Christian High School. When I came to the school, I heard that the school would open the student's news paper club for the first time. I became so excited about that, and joined in the club with full of zeal. However, after the first paper came out, the members in the club didn't want to do the paper anymore. But, I still wanted to do the paper. Thus, I decided to make the paper by myself. However, it was impossible for me to cover all the paper contents. So I decided to make the paper as the sport edition paper. Since it would be my first paper which was written by me, I wanted it to look like a professional paper such as the New York Times. Thus, I started subscribing New York Times weekly, and looked up its style of writing. Also, I went to my school basketball game to take the fresh action pictures for the paper, and I even waited until 7:30 pm after school to have a personal interview with boy's basketball coach. When my sport paper finally published, all students and teachers in my school said like 'Who made this paper?', 'Man this paper is full of fun.' All these positive reactions gave me a big confidence and made me publish another sport edition.

I personally think the experience from the news paper club is significant for my life because not only I did not stop writing a paper even though there was no one to work with me, but also I actually made people be satisfied with my paper. Therefore, I am sure that my consistent zeal of being a world famous journalist will make me get through every hard course from Penn State, and be successful graduate of Penn State.

The essay should be fewer than 500 words, but my essay is about 550 words,, so can you give any suggestion for that?? and i am not sure whether my first and last paragraph is good enough or not. Thank you!
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 25, 2010   #2
Actually, I have never stoppedgiven up any goals until I got them done.

Until I was in middle school, I was not sure thataboutwhichthe career I should seek for.

Then one day, I read onean article which said, 'Three major news paper companies in Korea are reporting news in favor of some corrupted politicians.'

be a world influent renowned Journalist, and fixexpose all the corruptions in media.

This goal led me to come to America. When I first came to America, I had no idea what could I could do forto achieve my goal. So, I just decided to take as many journalism related courses as I could. Thus, I took 3 English classes, and sociology class, and did not take any science and math class because I thought science and math would not be important for my goal. As a non-English person who came to America for the first time, it was a heavy load to take 3 English classes and sociology class atduring one year. However, my strong passion for my goaljournalism kept encouraging me to go forward, ending up having B for my all 3 English classes and B+ for my sociology class.
OP SeanNa 1 / 3  
Nov 25, 2010   #3
Thank you for the correction!, if you found more error please be free to tell me!, and it there any way to shrink the volume, plz tell me too! thx a lots!
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 25, 2010   #4
Some help for shrinking your word count;

After I finishedCompleting my first year in America, I came tojoined Lehigh Valley Christian High School. When I came to the school,At Lehigh Valley I heard that the school would open thelearned that the school was going to form a student's news paper club for the first time. I became so excited about that , and joined in the club with full of zealso much enthusiasm . However, after the first paper came out , the members in the clubdidn't want to do the paper anymorewanted to stop further publications . But, I still wanted to do the paper. Thus, Iand decided to makepublish itthe paperall by myself. Since itHowever, it was impossible for me to cover all the paperprevious contents,So I decided to make the paper as thepublish a sport edition paper . SinceBecause itwould bebeingmythe first paper which was written by me, I wantedwished it to look likehave a professional papertouch such as the New York Times. Thus, I started subscribingsubscribed for New York Times weekly, and looked upstudied its style of writing. Also, I went toattended my school basketball games to take the fresh action pictures for the paper., and I evensometimes waited until 7:30 pm after school to have a personal interviews with boy'sthe basketball coach. When my sport paper was finally published, all students and teachers in my school said likewere astonishingly said , 'Who made this paper?', 'Man this paper is full of fun.' All these positive and encouragingreactions comments gave me a bigboosted my confidence and made me publish another sport edition.

I personally think thebelieve this experience from the news paper club iscontributed significantlyforto my lifeself-confidence because not only I did not stop writing a papereven though there was no one to work with me, but also I actually made people be satisfied with my paper.

Therefore, I am sure that my consistent zeal of being a world famous journalist will make me get through every hard courseface any challengefromat Penn State, and be a successful graduate of Penn State.------- I am not in much favour of using the word "consistent" because, for me, it doesn't click here well. I would rather prefer the words such as ambitious, perceverance
OP SeanNa 1 / 3  
Nov 25, 2010   #5
Thank you so much for your help! it help me so a lots!!
Hope you have a great thanks giving day night!


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