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I would continue one of my greatest passions - tennis (if forced to choose one of my activities)


Interste11ar 2 / 1 1  
Feb 1, 2016   #1
Prompt: If you could only do one of the activities you have listed in the Activities section of your Common Application, which one would you keep doing? Why? (approx 100 words)

Note: I am currently applying to Michigan as a sophomore transfer student fro Rutgers University. Please be as harsh as possible :)

If I could do only one of my activities, I would like to continue my passion of playing tennis. Being part of the club tennis team in my first semester as a college student provided an excellent means to relieve stress throughout the semester, and also served as a great platform on which to meet and befriend new people. The latter was incredibly helpful to ease my transition into a new environment. Playing tennis during the semester also served as an important form of exercise, ensuring I stayed active and healthy. As someone who dislikes exercising in the gym, preferring instead to spend time outdoors, tennis was my primary method of physical activity. Perhaps most importantly, however, playing tennis allows me to continue enjoying one of my passions; tennis has been a large part of my life thus far, and I envision it will continue to be for quite a while.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Feb 1, 2016   #2
Nathan, your response is clear and provides the reviewer with an idea as to how tennis can help you become a better adjusted and high performing student at the university in the future. I wish that you had indicated some information in the essay about how you would like to join to the tennis team of the university (if one exists) or perhaps how you want to start one (if one doesn't exist) because of the benefits that playing tennis offers students.

You have some slight grammatical errors that I feel need to addressed below:

... Being part of the club tennis team TENNIS TEAM DURING in my first semester... great platform on WITH which to meet ... incredibly helpful to ease IN EASING my transition into ... dislikes exercising in the gym GYM EXERCISES... , tennis was IS my primary method... Perhaps most importantly, however , playing tennis allows me to continue enjoying one of my passions; tennis has been a large part of my life thus far, and I envision it will continue to be for quite a while. A MORE RELAXED AND ADJUSTED COLLEGE LIFE AS I CONTINUE MY EDUCATION.

I edited the last sentence because it was just redundant without offering any new meaning. You can opt to change the last sentence content instead.


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