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an undergraduate dance course - personal statement


stacey 1 / -  
Apr 21, 2010   #1
Hi I am applying for a undergraduate dance course,

This is my personal statement can i have some help please

Stacey xxx


The stage is a very exciting, addictive and electrifying place for me. I love to dance for an audience giving them everything I have and in return I wait for there applause. I have always had a love for the performing arts since I can remember; for there has never really been anything else I have ever wanted to do apart from dance.

I wish to undertake a Work based learning programme so I can convert my National diploma in Musical theatre into a BA (Hons) Degree. In the future my aim is to be a fantastic GCSE dance teacher with extensive knowledge to give to my students. I really want to do this course to expand my expertise of dance on a practical level but also to study other forms of dance to widen my understanding further. I am extremely creative, technical and very professional and I feel these are the skills that are needed to commit to this course in order to fully prepare for a varied and high level career in teaching dance.

My performing arts training took place at the prestigious Performing Arts College Italia Conti's in London on a three year scholarship course. During my training I performed in many shows, Top Cat at the Wimbledon Theatre, A Shakespeare Tour, performed at the Royal Albert Hall and pantomimes in Chesterfield and Lincoln. I graduated in 2006 and was offered a position on P & O's luxury cruise liner the Oriana playing many leading roles in the seventeen shows performed. Other performances include a production of Las Vegas at the NEC Birmingham, ensemble in Mother Goose Bruce James productions, and ensemble in Peter Pan Chris Mareno productions. Performed weekly at the exclusive Hilton Hotel in London. Was part of the Heart UK Video, danced at Wembley Stadium during the Carling Cup game between Tottenham & Chelsea. I was asked to produce a DVD to help educational teachers in schools to teach dance and this has been extremely successful. Been part of Cambridge fashion week and is currently the promotional face of West End Theatre Tokens. Christmas of 2009 was spent in Milan, Italy as a show girl in the production Crazy Girls.

My performing experience has shaped me Whilst performing I have never lost my love for teaching and I love to use my inspiration to encourage others. I have recently qualified as a teacher with the ISTD of dance gaining an impressive honour. My specialities include Street Jazz, Salsa, Modern, Disco Freestyle, Hip-Hop, Musical Theatre, Commercial Jazz, Private tuition and Audition Preparation.

I am currently supervising teaching GCSE dance at Linton Village College which I absolutely love and this has made me more enthusiastic in improving my qualifications. I am passionate, hardworking and I am devoted to what I do and I look forward to a future in dance.

Sarareh 4 / 9  
Apr 21, 2010   #2
Performed weekly at the exclusive Hilton Hotel in London.

Fragment ---this is not a sentence. Sentence needs subject. like I performed...
----------------------------------
programme ---> program
honour------->honor
----------------------------------
for there applause. or for their applause.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Apr 22, 2010   #3
commas:
I love to dance for an audience, giving them everything I have, and in return I wait for there applause. -----Now it is a beautiful sentence.

I wish to undertake a Work work-based learning programme so I can...

Here... I'll add 2 commas and a word:
I am extremely creative, technically proficient, and very professional, and I...

commas:
I am currently supervising teaching GCSE dance at Linton Village College, which I absolutely love, and this has made me more enthusiastic in improving my qualifications. I am passionate, hardworking, and I am devoted to what I do, and I look forward to a future in dance.

:-)


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