Hello, vicepres18
First of all indicate your real name, so nobody dares to copy your work.
Second, i think the content of your essay is ok and the topic itself has a potential, but the way it is served could be better. Try to intrigue the readers with this topic, try to stimulate their attention more by providing mind baffling examples of parallel universes paradoxes of your own creation -- just something more edgy.
Btw, is there a word limit?
A couple years ago, I came across the " His Dark Materials" Trilogy by Philip Pullman. The main focus of the book is on existence of parallel universes and their existence .
When my conductor ( who is that, the only thing that comes up in my mind is a conductor of orchestra and train)
the example of turning your head to the left or right is not really fascinating, try something different and show that possible results of the " chain reaction" you mentioned.
And i would suggest you to read " End of Eternity" by Isaac Azimov. It's a very interesting novel about parallel universes of some sort, too.