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The day my career ended : My physical and emotional struggle


Jlucoff 1 / -  
Oct 20, 2011   #1
It all happened in the blink of an eye. As my snowboard slipped out from under me, I felt a pop that had become all too familiar. While it's hard to explain the feeling of dislocating your shoulder, it's a unique mix of pain and numb combined with the inability to move your arm. Being my tenth dislocation in as many months, I was confident in my ability to guide my humerus back to its common resting place in the scapula of my glenohumeral joint. My confidence was soon shattered since my shoulder simply would not budge, and thus twenty minutes later I found myself being picked up by my mother at ski patrol and hauled off to the nearest emergency room. After three hours of failed attempts to relocate my shoulder, it was finally returned to its rightful location and I was sent home after what the doctor claimed was the nastiest dislocation he had ever seen.

Soon after this traumatic experience, I underwent a surgical procedure to essentially reconstruct my damaged ligaments and secure my shoulder in place. Five months later, I still look back on my decision to have this operation as one of the hardest choices I have ever made, since this surgery has rendered me unable to play soccer during my senior season. Having been the starting goalkeeper for my high school soccer team since freshman year, I was forced to take on a very different role. While filling out stat sheets and filming important games do not offer the same rush as playing, I still feel as though I have contributed to the team by mentoring the many freshmen and sophomores that populate our youthful squad.

Throughout this physical and emotional struggle, my ever-persistent effort to return to the sport I love has granted me success in some respects. As a result of my rehabilitation efforts, I have recently been cleared to return to training 45 days ahead of schedule. And while I am still unable to play in games, it is a liberating feeling to once again suffer through the hardships of practice with my secondary family. While I am excited to return, I am also grateful for what my time off has done for me. In my absence from athletic competition, I have discovered new interests in the other aspects of my life, helping me become a more versatile individual.

May 17th was the day any athlete dreads, the day my world disintegrated and the day that ended my high school soccer career. However, more optimistically, May 17th was the day where I discovered that the world doesn't revolve around soccer. While I cannot control whether these events happen to me or not, I can certainly control my perspective. Having to deal with such a traumatic injury has made me a stronger and more resilient person. While I am willing to accept that this traumatic event has defined the end of my competitive soccer career, I will not let any event that is out of my control define my life.
leonardjo 3 / 4  
Oct 20, 2011   #2
I think your essay is very well organized. You've succeeded in developing your idea step by step in a nice manner.
However, your essay can be improved by adopting the main principle of college application essay: Don't tell, but show it.
It's kind of abstract, but I'm sure you will manage to understand it!
Good luck!


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