Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 6

Even until this day, I still remember what some monk said once to me about success

Lexusnguyen1995 2 / 5 2  
Sep 5, 2016   #1
"Success is a journey, not a destination" said from a Vietnamese monk that I met three years ago while I was a volunteer at a temple which had changed the way I live my life. Three years ago, I was around 17 I was a lazy child I value my sleeps more than my studies. Although, I made honor roll from time to time, but it was nothing compare to other kids. My parents always ask me "How come you're not smart?", "Other people's kids study 10 hours a day and why you're only study for an hour?", and "How can you become a doctor when you value your sleeps more than your studies?" I replied "Well, let's pray for a miracle". My parents did nothing but shook their heads with disappointment. Living a lazy life with a dream but without a goal is a form of self-harm. A voice inside my head keep telling "when will stop living like this?" until I met this monk who changed my way of living.

During the Lunar New Year Festival at Tinh Luat temple, while taking my break from volunteering all day in the food court I saw this monk from Vietnam was writing calligraphy and sat down to have a chat with him. I asked him "Hello, I heard that most Buddhist monks in the Asian countries can do fortune telling by reading people's face... is that true? If it is true can you read mine?" even though I don't believe in these kind of things but I'm interested of his response. He looked at my face and said "Talent!" "What?" I asked "I said talent! You have talent, you are a very smart girl, you just don't know it yet" he responded. I was stunned for a moment because I never heard anything like that in my life before.

Ever since I came to America, I always have an inferiority complex I feel like I was never good enough, I always lose to the other kids because I don't know English and by that I couldn't do well in school . Even my parents said that I'm nothing compare to the other kids once in a while because of that I stop trying so hard and give up easily.

"Give me your right hand" he demanded I asked him "why?" and gave him my right hand. He looked at my right palm and said "The print on your palm tells me that you will stay in school for quite a while. I'm guessing you want to be a doctor? "How do you know I want to be a doctor?" I asked. The monk chuckled and said "It's my personal knowledge... Doctors are one of the most prestigious job with an outstanding income, and highly respected by the society in a word "success". However, the road to become a doctor is very challenging. Most people will think that if they become a doctor they will achieve success, but they are wrong. Success is a journey not a destination because there is no endpoint to it. You never stop, you will keep going forward" "Well then, where is the destination? How can a journey does not have a destination?" I asked. The monk smiled at me and continue with his statement "The destination is what you left behind and what you contribute to society, to life and most importantly to yourself". After hearing what the monk said, I went home and do research on how to become a doctor. I researched about different field in the medical industry and what class to take to meet the requirement for medical school.

During three months of summer after graduating high school, I reevaluated myself and my life. I remember what the monk told me and decided to start off my own journey at Lone Star Cy-fair Community College. Ever since, I started at Lone Star I never take a break I work hard to become a member of Phi Theta Kappa and getting into President's List. Recently, I just got accepted to Houston Methodist Hospital as a volunteer in the ER. I'm excited for my orientation in this September and start the volunteer. I am thankful that I met the monk at the temple because he had enlightened me. If it wasn't for him I would still be the same hopeless kids that I once was. Even until this day, I still remember what he said to me "Success is a journey not a destination" and therefore I will never stop my journey.

ashelarisa48 36 / 52 4  
Sep 5, 2016   #2
Hello, I have read your essay and found a little error in grammatical.

"Success is a journey, not a destination" said from a Vietnamese monk ...

... found me as I was a lazy child tenageer because (...) than study I value my sleeps more than my studies .

My parents always ask me "How come you're not smart? why are you so lazy?",

... the Asian countries can do know one's fortune telling by reading people's their face... is that true?

If it is true, can could you read mine?"

Actually, your essay is clearly enough, I can get your point and it is an interesting experience. However, I do not exactly what kind of volunteery programme you did because you did not tell more about it. I think it is one of good parts to make your essay more impressive. You can describe more about what kind of volunteery program and why you joined it.

Good luck!
OP Lexusnguyen1995 2 / 5 2  
Sep 6, 2016   #3
hi, thank you so much for reading my essay! I don't know what to put more because it not really a volunteer program, it just an event (lunar new year) that the Vietnamese community gather to help the temple. There were no paperwork or anything like that you just help to organize (prepare the food, selling food and other souvenir).
TJLuschen - / 241 203  
Sep 7, 2016   #4
Hi, I enjoyed your essay. I am not really an expert at these essays, but it seems to me like you talk a little too much about the monk and not enough about yourself. It was very interesting to read though, and maybe they can get all the details from your transcript. My cousin actually teaches at Cy-Fair high school and my sister-in-law teaches at Cy Creek. Did you go to one of those schools? Good luck with your essay and your admission. Watch out for your punctuation. There were a lot of missing periods, I dont' know if I caught them all.
OP Lexusnguyen1995 2 / 5 2  
Sep 12, 2016   #5
Hi! Thank you so much for your feedback, you're almost close I went to Cy-Ridge which is also part of Cyfair district. :)
Iedha01 21 / 40  
Sep 13, 2016   #6
I have read your essay and i think it is a very interesting topic. It such like a motivating and inspiring essay. However, i found a mistake in writing a word, you missed one letter behind. It is fatal as it is at your title

... I still remember what some monk said once to me abou_ sucess
It must be ..... about
I suggest you to do not repeat the same word, try to find the synonym
...Living a lazy life with...
...."when will stop living....
You can change "living" to become "persisting"

Home / Undergraduate / Even until this day, I still remember what some monk said once to me about success