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Dear Future Roommate, Stanford supplement. "Bring out your bling!"

mrinmoo 1 / 1  
Dec 5, 2010   #1
This is the Stanford supplement asking you to write a letter to your future roommate to "help us, and them, get to know you better". I've been very informal with it, 'cause Stanford has a couple more essays which are serious. Does it seem too shallow? It also needs a lot of editing, it's way over it's word limit. All help is appreciated. Be fierce with your criticism please.

Dear Future Roommate,

You better bring out your bling because Bollywood is coming to live with you! All my friends call me a huge drama queen and I have known to engineer Broadway with every step I take. I am exactly like your typical Bollywood movie: loud, colorful and full of irrelevant song-and-dance sequences, particularly in the rain. I can absolutely convince you that I was subjected to the million atrocities in the torture chamber of a sadistic super villain, when all I've really done, is stub my toe. If it bothers you, I can try to switch it off but then, you'll lose your home entertainment center!

Being Bengali, I'm both scholarly and slightly deranged. I get very passionate about the tiniest of things, very fast. So minutes after I'm bawling my eyes out at Leonardo di Caprio dying in the last scenes of Blood Diamond, expect me to start googling "civil war and coerced diamond mining in Sierra Leone" , joining internet campaigns and trying to get you enthused about a fundraiser. The passion stretches to my studies too, so please don't roll your eyes and call me a geek when I'm hopping all over the place, like a bunny on a sugar rush, making charts and trying to initiate class debates for a mundane homework assignment.

I have a claustrophobically intimate, grand Indian family who has recently been introduced to Skype, so expect innumerable video calls from across the Pacific. And, when my grandma asks you why things aren't working out with your boyfriend, she's not being nosy, just affectionate. On the bright side, expect cartons and cartons of yummy Indian delicacies like thekuas, malpuas, pickles and laddoos, and some of the shiniest bangles and the brightest duppattas you'll ever see.

There are only a few things you are forbidden to do. You cannot hate Johnny Depp. You cannot eat the last cookie. And you cannot remain clueless when I throw some iconic movie/book quote at you. Doing any of the above will risk my wrath. But then again, seeing as I read far too many books and watch way too many movies, you might have a lot of those latter moments. And though my wrath is fearsome to behold, I'm horrible at staying angry at anyone for more than an hour, so maybe you can breathe easy.

Mrinmoyee Chatterjee
P.S. Did I mention I love being cryptic and unintelligible?
P.P.S. I kid you not about the Johnny Depp thing. Seriously.
Altons 2 / 5  
Dec 5, 2010   #2
I love it! I don't think it's too shallow at all, because it conveys your voice and persona so well. It's very eccentric :).

The only sentence that bothers me is: "If it bothers you, I can try to switch it off but then, you'll lose your home entertainment center!" It sounds very tacky. But that might just be me.
jfk 2 / 7  
Dec 11, 2010   #3
This is great stuff! I really do think the informal tone is appropriate and well-done. In some cases, this could be horribly botched, but I think you nailed it.

This is the one essay that is really supposed to be personal, and as Altons said, your eccentricity is great.

Nice job, and best of luck.
OP mrinmoo 1 / 1  
Dec 19, 2010   #4
Thanks. I sent my essays. And I edited out the home-ent line. Thanks a lot, and I'm hoping I get in!
Wrinkles - / 1  
Dec 29, 2010   #5
Too many words. You can only have 250.

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