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'a developed and a developing economy' - U of T essay ( issue of importance)


shamveel 2 / 3  
Jan 6, 2009   #1
Choose an issue of importance to you - the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation.

(please tell me if any changes required)

"Upon the subject of education, not presuming to dictate any plan or system respecting it, I can only say that I view it as the most important subject which we as a people may be engaged in."- Abraham Lincoln

"Education". A simple word which encompasses the complexities behind the attainment of knowledge. In today's world, education has become an issue of grave importance. In some societies, it has become mandatory that each and every person should be provided with a basic education. Yet illiteracy and unemployment still play a major role in our social hierarchy. Numerous individuals are forced with great endeavours simply because of a lack of education. Education has helped me build my character. Over the years, I have learned that education is a necessity for the upbringing of any individual. Every single person is born with a talent, education helps to bring out that talent.

Education encompasses the learning of knowledge, information and skills during the course of life. In a world where corruption and terrorism prevails; education can be that factor, which helps eliminate such evils. Such ills can be combated by the effective implementation of stringent laws, which without the help of education would be an unassailable task. It also helps solve various other predicaments such as poverty, world hunger, overpopulation, health related issues and many more.

It is necessary that we ensure that everyone is provided with a sufficient education. There should be an increase in number of educational institutes, especially public schools so that even the poor will have access to education. In a country, like India, where more than a quarter of the population is under the poverty line such a measure becomes a requirement for its social and economic development. Uneducated people suffer the wrath of unemployment and poverty. They fail to understand the workings of the society. Illiteracy has lead to overpopulation in under-developed countries. The poor population feel that the more children they produce the more hands they have to earn. In reality, they just add to the burden of their mundane lives. Education will provide with them knowledge of family planning and certify population stability.

Education is a macroeconomic concept which leads to social and economic development of a community, a nation. Without education there would be no doctors, lawyers or any other professional for that matter. I, as a student, believe that everyone holds the right to education and they should be provided with the support they require.

Education is the difference between a developed and a developing economy. Thirty years ago, Dubai was just a desert, and now it has become an international hub, all due to the contributions of highly skilled and educated workers. Education helps broaden the mind's horizons. The creativity within man is brought out due to education. With the advent of education, more and more people can hone their skills.

As a student who wants to take up a future in business, I know it is imperative for me to be highly educated. With the degree of competition prevalent in the economy, jobs are hard to come by. A quality education at a reputed university would provide me with the exposure I need to occupy a high position in an eminent company and would help me ratify the problems that are related to uneducated people and help me implement effective policies to eradicate such issues.

Education is a stepping stone to success. It equips people with knowledge and elevates them to a better standard of living.

this is my essay can you guys help me with it any changes are welcome and will be appreciated. I need it really quickly.
thanks
justinwang 10 / 28  
Jan 7, 2009   #2
Your essay is good. You answer the question well and clearly.

However,personally, I think you should talk more about the situation of India to make your essay more expressive. Otherwise, the essay is just like an argumentative essay.

Wish that helps :)
OP shamveel 2 / 3  
Jan 7, 2009   #3
thanks for your input i wish to see more people comment as i really want this essay to be acceptable.
but thanks a lot for your help if theres anything i can do please let me know :)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 7, 2009   #4
At the beginning, you refer to the word "education." So, put it in " " marks.

"Education." A simple word which encompasses

You might need a semi-colon here:

In a world where corruption, terrorism prevails; education can be that factor which helps eliminate such evils.

At the end, can you say something more specific than this: As a student who wants to take up a future in business I know its imperative for me to be highly educated. That sentence makes me think that you are getting your OWN education mixed in with "education" as a global issue. It is better to focus on the point you are making about education being a crucial issue because it is our only hope for eliminating injustice, suffering, poverty, terrorism, and so forth.

Stay focused on how "education" is the ISSUE that underlies all other issues.

However, at the end, you WILL have to say something about how you want to receive your education at the U of T. SO, describe how your educational and career goals relate to this process of improving the world by promoting education.
OP shamveel 2 / 3  
Jan 7, 2009   #5
i know this is a lot to ask but can you write down something? just the additional stuff
it would be really helpful.
EF_Constance - / 143  
Jan 7, 2009   #6
Yet, illiteracy and unemployment still play a major role in our social hierarchy.

In a world where corruption and terrorism prevails, education can be that factor, which helps eliminate such evils.

It also helps solve various other predicaments, such as poverty, world hunger, overpopulation, health related issues and many more.

In a country, like India, where more than a quarter of the population is under the poverty line, such a measure becomes a requirement for its social and economic development.

Without education, there would be no doctors, lawyers or any other professional for that matter. I, as a student, believe that everyone holds the right to education, and they should be provided with the support they require.

Great JOB!!!!!!
EF_Constance - / 143  
Jan 7, 2009   #7
You've got it. You definitely answered the prompt... Just make the final tweaks to the essay and send it!!! :) Good luck!


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