Media pressure is my personal concern
Media pressure is my personal concern. Newspapers, magazines, computers, and television are all a part of this mass field and I genuinely believe it has negatively affected our nations' young people. I acknowledge that this chain of instant communication has helped relay important information, but on the down side it has also gone too far. I want to define media pressure- as I believe it to be- as the way that the media, in every form, has pressured or influenced the way people- particularly youth- act, think, speak, and ultimately live.
As I am a seventeen-year-old girl, a significant media pressure on me is to be painfully skinny. Bulimia and Anorexia are real medical conditions that have been a last resort of girls that were literally dying to either become or stay skinny. Media has put a stick thin image of women into our brains as they redundantly portray their image of unrealistic beauty to youth. Instead of promoting being happy and healthy, they instilled that we should find some way to become their definition of beautiful. I find this to be sickening. Companies have made millions by selling people diet pills, magazines filled with women with protruding hipbones, products to make a pencil thin silhouette, while we are left with insecure, bulimic, depressed women. In the real world, not every women can be a size zero.
What goes along with this is the pressure to worship famous personal. The media wants us to admire these people even though they are human- just like us. They make mistakes and are not perfect, yet they are somehow suitable for praise. Society has wasted time and money holding these people on pedestals and copying their every move. Teenagers will do whatever they see Tom Cruise do, or will eat whatever Kate Hudson eats, as they have been taught that if we are not like them then we are of little importance. A study showed that more young women have been having babies lately in relation to the fad of famous actresses having babies. People will go to the lengths of having a child, just because their favorite star is having one? Not only are we influenced to be a duplicate of Hollywood's best, but also we are influenced by their opinions. Being influenced on what to wear is bad enough and yet recently actors used their media spotlight to voice who they think should be for president. To me I believe they should stick to acting, as most of them do not know one thing about politics.
The media is a vast network of communication that can be resourceful and good in moderation. My personal concern is that media pressure is dangerous and faulty. The media is willing to risk the health and safety of our nation to make an extra buck. Instead of being educated free thinkers, we are now taught to blend in and do what everyone else is doing. If everyone else jumped off a bridge would you jump too?Good evening :)
Since you didn't include what kind of assistance you were seeking, I have made some general comments about the piece.
Make sure you are appropriately using possessive apostrophes. For instance, "nations'" should be "nation's" as it is one singular nation that possesses the young people, not multiple nations.
"As I am a seventeen-year-old girl, there is significant media pressure on me to be painfully skinny. Bulimia and AnorexiaThis is not a proper noun, so it shouldn't be capitalized. ..."
I think your content is great. You do a great job explaining your position and support it with great examples. Your conclusion is very appropriate as well. Nice job.
Regards,
Gloria
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